How to be Forever Alone [#Wattys2020]

33.

My reaction was quick, sitting up straight and flinging my hair behind me as I turned to see who made the comment.

I think I just stopped and stared for a moment.

She's tall, and I mean much taller than me, and her dark golden skin is covered in freckles. Her dark brown curls reach down to her shoulder blades, probably hiding her angel wings. She's just stunning and I can't stop looking at her.

"You haven't even had a sip of that drink I gave you," she says pointing to the cup in my hand.

"So it was you?" I reply, diverting my gaze to make sure she was telling the truth.

"Yeah it was," she answers roguishly, making her way to sit down beside me.

I'm not sure what to say next... And I know the silence has thrown us into this awkward state of being, but I just can't come up with anything to keep this conversation going. I don't think you could even consider this a conversation at this point.

The girl has her own cup of beer and takes a sip, before noticing I had gone back to studying everything about her.

Her eyebrows were raised, eyeing me from her side of the bench.

She almost spilt her drink as she started talking, "What?"

For a second too, I was scared that her less then average beer would go everywhere, but quickly I end up laughing at the situation.

"I'm sorry," I say hiding my smile behind my right hand, "I didn't mean to laugh."

"There's no need to be sorry," she nudges me, "Sometimes I think the world needs more moments like this."

"It does?" I wasn't sure what she was trying to get at.

"Yeah," she perks up her shoulders, "This world has become so dark and full of hate, sometimes you just need to become a ray of sunshine."

I don't know what came over me, it kind of just... slipped out, "Well, you definitely are."

Wow, Claire! Smooth...

"Really?" she asks with glee.

"You are," I say trying not to make this weird, "you seem so happy."

"I like to think I'm happy most of the time," she says.

As I push a strand of hair behind my ear, I continue, "I think... I thought I was happy."

"You thought?" she questions, turning her head to look down at my hands holding my red solo cup.

We had talked so little, but it already felt like a lifetime since she pointed out that I hadn't even tasted my beer yet.

"I don't think any of the happiness I've felt recently was even real." I breathe out, "My life is a freaking mess!"

"I'm sure it's not." she tries to console me.

I couldn't stop myself now, everything was just flowing out of me like a waterfall, "Oh it is! I quit school. Went across the ocean. Kissed two separate people, for the first time in my life. Then, I came home to my brother hating me and my mom dating our neighbour. And, during all of this, I started writing in this stupid journal like it were actually someone who would even care about what I had to say!"

"Wow... That's a lot." she says with one of her iconic eyebrows raised, "Maybe your life is a mess."

"I need to stop talking..." I say with the realization of my irritating mumblings.

"No! Don't stop!" she exclaims.

It almost felt like she was interested in what I was saying. She seemed eager to just sit there and keep listening to my horrible adventure, and not to mention my awful storytelling.

"Really," she confessed laying her left hand gently on my right arm, "this is probably the most interesting conversation I've had in a while. It's like the plot for some crazy action or drama movie. I would love to hear more."

"Are you sure you're not just trying to make me feel better?" I ask, taking in the atmosphere around us.

The temperature had gotten colder and most of the lovebirds had trickled back into the house where the sound of shattering glass was becoming more common.

She flinches at the noise, taking her hand back and letting her hair dance around her shoulders, "That's not good... My parents are going to kill me."

I had no idea, "This is your house?"

"Yeah," she replies with a hint of an uneasy smirk, "although, I don't really live here anymore. My parents kind of just left for the week, so I thought I would take advantage."

"Now I feel bad for contributing to the mess you'll have to clean up," I say grinning.

"What are you talking about?!" she chimes, re-adjusting herself on the bench, "You've done no such thing."

"I don't call sitting here with a cup in my hand nothing," I state, raising my beer.

"Which you still haven't taken a sip of," she says grabbing my drink from my hands, "So, tilt your head back and open up."

"What?!" I exclaim.

She looks at me with this sort of understanding expression, "You'll be fine, I promise."

I don't know what compelled me to agree, but I did.

"Okay," I shake my head as I do as she says.

At first, she slowly starts pouring my beer into my mouth, but quickly I found that I couldn't keep up and it turned in to the shower I wasn't expecting to have today.

She lifts the cup back and away from me and I can hear her giggle as I try to wipe away this ghastly amber liquid.

"That was great!" I say sarcastically.

"I'm sorry," she continues to giggle.

"Now don't you go saying sorry on me now," I point out.

"Well in that case," she calms down, "I need to know your name."

I had completely forgotten that most people would have introduced themselves to each other by this moment in time, but who would I be if not one to fall back on old habits.

"My name is Claire," I extend my hand.

Our hands meet as she says, "I'm Tess."