A Force Of Gravity✅

48

-Will- Present-

"Oh, won't you stay with me?
'Cause you're all I need."
-Stay with Me by Sam Smith

Today has been a long and tiring day. I was supposed to spend the entire day in bed, doing nothing. Instead, everyone has found out about the thing I've been hiding for months. Now I'm having to run after Ben as he smokes a cigarette in the rain.

Standing beside him, I lean back against the wall and tilt my head up. The rain pours down, drenching my joggers and hair. Ben is silent beside me, frowning as he stares off into the distance.

"You killed someone." He blurts out slowly. I don't respond for a moment.

"I did." I whisper, the rain draining my voice out. I shiver from the rain and I am relieved that I had pulled a hoodie over my head earlier.

"You killed someone, didn't tell us and left." He repeats and I sigh heavily, growing irritated. Somehow, my friends are more angry about the fact that I didn't tell them rather than being angry about me killing someone. I don't know why they've come to this conclusion but it is making me more and more frustrated.

"Are you going to keep saying the obvious or can we move on already?" I snap grumpily. Ben frowns, turns to study my face and then relaxes. He lifts up a box of cigarettes.

"Cigarette?" He offers and I shrug, taking one from the box.

"Sure." I mumble, borrow his lighter and inhale the smoke. We stay in a comfortable silence. The air smells of wet wood and plants.

"You really loved her that much? Enough to kill someone and cover it up. Enough to risk destroying your entire life for." Ben asks curiously. I frown.

"I don't...." I try to protest but he scoffs.

"Will, shut up and be honest." Ben says, sounding tired. I inhale again. You'd think that after everything I would do for Rose, after everything I have done for Rose, I should know how I feel about Rose. But I have no fucking idea.

I don't know if I'm capable of love and even if I am, I don't think I'd recognise it if I do feel it. What does being in love supposed to feel like?

"Yes and I'd do it again if it means protecting her." I say simply. "You would do it for Brooke."

"I'd do it for all of you. It isn't why you did it that's the problem. The problem is you didn't tell me." He says in frustration, his brown eyes darkening. I roll my eyes.

"I'm not having this conversation with all of you again. I did what I did and everyone now knows. I'm still pissed at you for the blackmailing shit, by the way." I say angrily. I can't believe that after all these months, he was the one messaging me.

"No one got hurt, it was harmless." He says in defence, his voice going so high that it reminds me of seventh grade. Everyone used to take the piss out of him because his voice was so high as he hadn't hit puberty yet.

One day, Ben had enough of them tormenting him and he got into a fight with five older boys. Of course, I had to get involved too. We lost, of course, but he was so happy that he fought back. So was his father.

"Can we go back inside? It's fucking cold and raining." I complain and he nods eagerly. We throw our cigarettes into the nearby bin and head back inside.