Secrets || Lando Norris

040

Elianna

I certainly wasn't feeling that low in a long, long time. Since I came to London, my mental health has gotten significantly better. I finally started eating properly after many years of restricting and met Zane, who at the time was one of the closest people to me.

Of course there were times where I felt like doing nothing, the lack of motivation is very common in general, but these were just a few times that were nothing compared to what happened today.

The moment that Zane left my apartment, everything inside felt black. The only things I could see were the dark moments of my life, that Zane so mercilessly reminded me about. His words kept playing in my head, you carry your shadows to this day, you never healed.

I cried because perhaps he was right.

"Whatever he told you, he was wrong," a voice so soft echoed as nimble fingers stroked my hair that were still damp from the shower that I took.

Lando held me in his arms tightly, providing comfort that I never thought I could get from him. He was propped against the dresser in the hall of my apartment, while I was on his lap with my face wet from tears, pressed to his chest that was now stained from my tears as well. He didn't mind. He didn't say a word about it.

He only focused on me, rocking me from side to side and his face leaned on my head. I sniffled, my heartbeat finally somewhat steady, but words that weighed me down still holding tightly in my head.

"He wasn't wrong."

"He was wrong, you let him get into your head," Lando argued and another tear fell down my cheek. His hand went from my hair to my arm, where he gently pushed me upwards, looking me straight in my face, "One thing I noticed about you is that you're very naive, Sparkles, and that you let everyone get to you. Especially the bad things."

I looked into his eyes for the first time, finding him watching me so attentively and his expression telling me he means the words he's saying. "I let him into my head because what he said was true. Perhaps not all of it, but–" I took a long breath before continuing because I felt another wave of emotions overwhelming me, "But he made me realise that I never healed."

Lando looked at me confused, "What things?" his hand resting on my arm, holding me in case I would fall down due to how weak I felt from all the emotions and crying. If I wouldn't feel like it, I would probably yell at myself for letting him see this side of me. But I didn't care at the moment.

"Your hoodie is all wet from my tears," a painful chuckle left my lips as my fingers touched the place on his chest where my head was moments ago, "And it's getting cold, you can't catch a cold because you're sitting on cold tiles because I'm being an emotional rollercoaster."

He carefully touched my hand and put it away, still holding it, "That's the last thing I'm worried about right now, seriously," one of the corners of his mouth turned upward in a small smile before he looked around, "Let's go there then."

Before I could stand up on my own, he scooted me up in his arms, and carried me bridal-style to my living room, where he placed me on the sofa and sat next to me. There was a half spilt glass of water that I don't even know how that happened.

"Thank you," suddenly left my lips.

"What for?" Lando asked, his eyes glistening in the colours of the warm candles still burning at the window sill, where behind them the scenery of sky turned dark as it closed to late evening hours.

I sheepishly looked down at my hands, at the nails that I scratched before, and said with a sad smile, "For dealing with whatever happened to me, I feel kind of embarrassed for you always getting me whenever I have problems with Zane."