Can't Have It All

Different Results

Odell POV-

"I can't do it." I got up from the table and was about to go after Kenya. She was out in the parking lot with Brandon.

"O." Vic put his hand on my chest to stop me.

I looked at him.

"She ain't gon learn if you don't at least give her more than 5 minutes of punishment."

"She's not my child Vic. She's my wife. I shouldn't be punishing her." I looked out the door at K and Brandon.

K was crying on Brandon's chest and it was fucking me up to my core.

Anybody that knows me, knows K was my weakness. I hated to see her pain. When she was in pain, so was I. It's always been like that. Every since college. I was always her rock. Her rock when she confronted her dad. Her rock when her mother died. Her rock while she was at Oxford.

The love I felt for her ran so deep, that when she was in pain at Oxford, I physically felt it. No matter where I was.

I remember I was just standing on the sidelines while the defense played my rookie year, while me and K was apart. All of sudden I felt this sharp pain in my stomach. It wouldn't go away. I had the doc look at it. He couldn't understand I was perfectly fine, up until then.

Come to find out, K was having some problems with her stomach and had to be rushed to the hospital. My
Pain didn't go away until I landed in Oxford, England and physically saw her.

It's weird I know. But what me and K have is deeper than what meets the eye. Our connection is something that only God can explain.

"I gotta just let her know I'm sorry." I tried to get pass Vic.

"Odell." He got in front of the door. "Why are you going to apologize for something you didn't do? Stop treating her like a baby, if she's not your child. She's a grown woman. Let her feel at least for a little while, what life would be like without you. That's the only way she's going to learn to appreciate you."

I sighed looking at them. I felt like I was seeing her in a burning building but couldn't save her. And I know that's extreme, but that's what I was feeling.

I hate being in love this deep. Why can't I be like Freshmen year Odell, when I was savage. Now I'm all grown, mature and in love. Fuck my life. Death to this Odell. Bring back the old one. 🙄😩

"If you go out there she gon do the same thing and she's never going to learn."

I softly hit my head against the wall. "Shit."

"And if she still out here when we about to leave, give her the cold shoulder. Act unphased if she tries to talk to you. I know it's hard, but this is the only way man. "

"How long should I be doing this shit?" I asked him.

"A month."

"A what? Hell no."

"You have to do it long enough where she feels your absence. A week ain't gon cut it."

"Two and a half that's it."

"A month bro. A month."

"A month?" I whined. "Ahhhhhh why man?" I rubbed my forehead like I had a headache.

"Oh shit here they come." Vic saw B and K walking toward the door. B was holding K's hand.

"Remember act cool." Vic warned me.

They opened the door.

"You heard what Josh Norman said?" Vic tried to fake conversation. "Talking about its gon be a long season for you."

"Dudes a clown. Ain't nobody worried about his weak ass." I tried to act like I ain't see K, wiping the tears from her eyes. I looked toward the wall.

"So O, I know you're a good Christian man. And a good Christian man, at least listens to what their future wife, who doesn't want to lose your NFL checks has to say. So at least listen to her." Brandon said.

I looked at Vic. He gave me the man up face.

"Ain't nothing to talk about. Come on Vic." Me and Vic was about to walk out.

"Oh no." Brandon held me back. "You might be angry. Which is justified. She was wrong. But don't act like she wasn't there when you was not only disabled, I know about your little disability." Brandon eyed me. "And when your ass was crippled. The least you can give her is two seconds to listen."

I looked at Vic. Vic gave me the no man face.

I sighed. "Fine."

Vic rolled his eyes.

"Vic give us a moment." I told him, assuring him I would be strong.

Brandon and Vic went back into the restaurant, leaving us alone.

"Baby I was 100 percent wrong. I'm done making excuses just please take me back. Please." She held my shirt with both her hands, looking me dead in the eyes, as tears filled hers.

"I already gave you too many chances."

"Give me one more baby I promise I won't mess it up." She held my face.

I rolled my eyes so hard internally.

"No Kenya."

"We can get married today or I will have the baby now. Just Odell I need you." She broke down.

"I don't want to be with somebody who I got to force to marry me or have my child. I want a woman that's willing to do it. I shouldn't have to beg the woman who says she belongs to me. I'm done Kenya. I'm done." I peeled her off of me and left her in the lobby of the restaurant.

I went in the bathroom. And just put both my hands on the side of the sink looking down.

I felt myself literally shaking and turning red. This shit was putting my body through more stress than actually being on a damn football field.

I put some cool water on my face and looked in the mirror. Everything in me told me to go back.

Told me to tell her how I can't even do five minutes without her. And that I understand she's busy. And that I'm still willing to wait until she's ready. And that I just want her to be my 1 again, and just make this shit up to
Me by riding me like she never rode me before back at the hotel and remind me, my name is on her 🙈 for a reason.
That if she loves me, to show me.

But Vic, despite his trifleness was right. She'll never learn.

And like they say if you want different results, you can't do the same thing. We've never broken up. So maybe just maybe with this break and me taking a different approach, I'll get different results.

Pray hard for me y'all that it's the results I want.