17. Talk

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your pov

"good morning time to wake up" you hear someone say. you slowly open your eyes and see Chris standing in the door opening.

 you slowly open your eyes and see Chris standing in the door opening

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 you feel something, or rather someone move next to you. then you remember last night. you must have fallen asleep while you were comforting Lily. you sit up straight to see how she's doing, she seems calmer now, but she looks like she doesn't want to leave her bed. "wake up Lils" you say to her. "i don't want to go to school" she says. "remember what i promised you yesterday?" you ask her. "that we can get a dress?" she says like she doesn't expect you to remember it. "exactly, and I promised you we go after school, but if you don't go to school then....." you say smiling, knowing it will work. and it does, she shoots up and gets dressed.

you get up to and walk to the hall where Chris is now standing waiting on Lily to get ready. "thank you" he says. "don't thank me for trying to help" you sat to him smiling, knowing he said it to you often enough. "where did you hear that?" he asks now smiling to. "a man with amazing abs once said it to me. I probably only remembered because he was so good looking" you say teasingly. "hm should I be jealous of this handsome man?" he says jokingly. "oh you absolutely should" you say. you want to walk past him but he grabs your and pushes you against the wall, kissing you deeply. 

"that's for yesterday" he says smiling as he lets go

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"that's for yesterday" he says smiling as he lets go. you blush before you walk into your room.

you walk downstairs and Chris and Lily are ready to leave. "have fun Lils" you say. she runs up to you and gives you a big hug, before she walks to Chris who's waiting at the door. "bye" she says before they leave.

when Chris returns he had a sad and stressed look on his face. "are you okay?" you ask him. "huh" he says, Cleary deep in thought. "what's wrong?" you ask him. "uhm, I. can you take care Lily this afternoon I kinda, I uhm, Nat and I are gonna talk. see if we can figure things out" he says. you softly nod, feeling hurt inside. it was selfish but you just hoped he would break up with Natalie, so you could be together with him. but at the same time you thought about Lily, how she would react when they would split up, she says she's okay with it but you don't really believe her. "I was gonna take Lily to shop for a dress this afternoon anyways" you say "is she coming here?" you ask him hesitantly. he nods softly, clearly not pleased with the whole situation.

the rest of the morning he is anxiously walking around, like he has no idea what to do. "okay sit down, you're making me anxious now too" you tell him. he looks at you but eventually sits down next to you on the couch. "what are you so nervous about?" you ask him. "I have no idea what to say to her, and she.....she can be very.....persuasive" he says vaguely. oh great, you think to yourself, he probably means she's great in bed, fantastic. you try not to sound jealous as you say "well, try to ignore .... that, just tell her you want an normal conversation with her" you tell him. "are you jealous?" he says, softly grinning at you. fuck he knows you so well by now, he fucking hears it in your voice, great. "don't change the subject, I'm trying to help" you tell him seriously. "okay, yeah, you're right" he says "but what if..." he says not finishing his sentence. "don't think in what if's, just tell her honestly where you stand, whatever that is. just tell what you feel, what you think. hopefully that's enough" you tell him. "you surely are wise beyond your years" he says, now smiling, seeming a little less anxious. "guess that's why I gravitate towards older men" you tell him teasingly. he smiles back and you think he's gonna lean in to kiss you, but he doesn't no instead he just hugs you, which kinda disappointed you. "thank you, I don't know what I would do without you" he says, holding you close. "thank you too, for everything" you say back.

later that day you come home, with a very happy Lily. she immediately runs up to Chris, who sits on the couch, to show her new dress. you walk behind her, but as you see Chris' face, your happy mood changes. he doesn't seem happy at all, he just forces a smile for Lily's sake, but you see right thru it. "go put it in your closet and go lay your clothes out for tomorrow, I'll be there in a sec. okay?" you say to her. she nods and runs happily upstairs, you sigh, happy she didn't notice her dad's mood. "I take it, it didn't go so well with Natalie" you ask him carefully. he shakes his head no. "what happened?" you ask him carefully, like he could burst out in tears or anger at any moment. "she just started yelling again, when I told her how I felt" he says softly. "maybe you guys just need a little more time" you say carefully. "yeah..maybe" he says. you grab his hand so he looks at you. "things will be okay, no matter what the 2 of you decide okay, it will be fine" you tell him, honestly believing that. you just hoped you wouldn't get hurt in the process.

"daddy?" you hear a soft voice say. "yes sweetheart" he says back, seeing the talk with you made him a little less sad. "can you read me a story?" she asks. shit maybe she did notice he was sad. "of course princess, go upstairs I'm coming" he says to her, smiling softly. "thank you y/n" he says. "don't thank me when I'm trying to help" you say smiling to him and he smiles back before he goes upstairs.

Chris' pov

you put Lily to bed and smile at her. "why are you upset daddy?" Lily asks you, which breaks your heart a little, you thought you hid it too well for her. "I'm not upset sweetheart, just a little tired" you tell her smiling softly. "is it mommy?" she asks. god she was so smart. "we're gonna figure it out, Lils" he says. she smiles a little "you never call me Lils, only y/n does that" she says smiling "I really like y/n". "I really like y/n too" you tell her. "are you in love with her?" she asks you, out of nowhere. "what, no" you tell her surprised. "yes you do, I saw you kiss her" she says, but she doesn't seem sad, no she seems......happy with that. "you probably didn't see it right" you tell her, brushing the hair out of her face. "yes I did, you kissed her this morning. I think she loves you back" she says in a happy tone. 

"I wouldn't mind y/n being my new mommy" she says, which shocks you. "no one is gonna be your new mommy, sweetheart" you tell her. "I know but I would like y/n to be my mom too. she's really nice. can't you just marry her" she tells you. "no sweetheart, I'm already married to your mom" you say, smiling a bit. "i, i wouldn't mind if you and mommy split up, you shouldn't just stay together form me. I told y/n that yesterday too. but she seems to think you 2 can figure thing out. But maybe you should just quit trying" the words shock you, because she not only sounds so much older than she really is, but she also seems totally fine with it.

"y/n told me about her parents yesterday, and she said sometimes it's better for people to split up. you know, if they don't love each other anymore" she says. "that's just it sweetheart, I still love your mom, so much" you tell her. "but you love y/n too right?" she says, hopeful eyes. "I like her yes" you admit to her. she grins at you. "so you can just marry her one day" she says smiling. "maybe one day" you tell her, knowing that will probably never happen, because what she doesn't know is that y/n is gonna leave eventually. you just can't get it over your heart to tell your little girl that yet. "goodnight princess" you tell her after you tugged her in. "goodnight daddy" she says back, before you leave her room.

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