Shade Of Love

49 | Path

Chapter 49 : Path

"What do you mean you can't do this, really Faith?," Omar asked. His voice was stern and saddened.

"I'm not trying to completely change everything in my life so suddenly, like no."

"Nobody said everything was changing, just a few things. For the safety of you and our child."

"I don't want to quit working because I love and trust you but at the end of the day I was taught if you give a man the power to feed you you give him the power to starve you. With me becoming a first time mom I don't want to put me and my child in that predicament."

"Why are you thinking that I would even try you on some weak shit like that? I ain't one of them bums or bitch boys you used to," he snapped.

"I didn't say you were Omar."

"You basically just did. Last time I checked I've been nothing short of a good ass dude to you and yeah at first having a kid scared the fuck out of me but I got with it and I'm here, but you have to trust me. I know what's best for OUR child, it's not just you becoming a parent."

"I never said it was, this is just a lot," I replied.

"You don't think me having to beat your ex ass and go to jail for it was a lot? Having to be worried about him harassing you? Come on man," he said, throwing his hand on top of his head.

"I had no control of that."

"You think I had control over Anita? Real shit?"

"I don't know. I just know I beat her ass weeks ago and yet she's still coming back crazier than ever so obviously you didn't handle her," I snapped.

"I thought that would've been enough. I don't get why you just don't trust me, you make it seem like you do but obviously that's a lie."

"This has nothing to do with trust this is about using caution. Last time I upped and turned my life upside down for someone I—."

"You got beat and hurt but once again I'm not him! Don't punish me for what he did!" he yelled.

I gulped and stared at him while tears began to run down my face. I understood the pain I was putting on him with me showing how high up my walls still were but I was just scared. He couldn't truly blame me for that, could he?

"When you figure out what you want to do and learn how to trust the man whose been good to you since day one you know where to find me," he announced.

He pulled on a black leather coat and walked out the front door, slamming it behind him.

Tears continued pouring out of my eyes like a waterfall running down my face. My heart suddenly began to beat louder and became heavier in my chest. I loved Omar. I was just so scared, of everything.

I tried wiping some of the tears off my face and grabbed my phone dialing Ashley's number. She answered quickly per usual, on the second ring.

"Ash, I think I—I think I um, messed up," I sobbed.

"What? What's wrong? What happened? Who do I need to beat up?," she yelled.