Memories

|66| • Not the Best Motivation to Get Married•

"I'm not sure that makes me feel better," I said, shaking my head a little.

"Why?" He asked. "I didn't sleep with them, shouldn't that make you feel better?"

"Well.. yeah. But first of all that was years ago, and second of all I know you... there were times when you didn't sleep with women even though you could have simply because you were too shy. I think that's changed quite a bit and maybe you feel like simply because now you can sleep with whoever you want to basically that you should. I know how it is. Whatever it is, if something is new and exciting you really want to try it. "

Again he was quiet for a moment. "Yes... but... I already did. And... I'm not sure if that will sound weird but it can be fun if you're really desperate, but... you know, then you came along," he admitted.

That was unexpected. "Then I came along?"

"Yeah. And I ... well, I slept with more than just a couple of women on tour -"

"Brian...," I cautioned him. I really didn't need to hear in detail about who all he slept with.

"It all has a point, Henrie, just listen, okay?" He asked of me. I nodded and let him continue. "So.. I .. Yeah, I slept with quite a few women here and there, but they ... well they wanted to sleep with a rockstar."

"Mhm... what is your point, Brian?" I asked, getting a little impatient. I didn't want to hear about his escapades.

"My point is that you... you're different. You want to have sex with me, you don't want to have sex with a rockstar. I mean, who knows, maybe you do, but you care about more than that. A lot more, I know that, I can tell. It feels different, you know? I care so much about you and you ... you can try to deny it but I know you care about me too, and that makes me happy. Those women, they never really cared about me. And... compared to you neither did my ex. Do you see where I'm going with this?" He finally asked hesitantly.

"I think so," I replied. I wasn't sure what to think of what I was hearing. It sounded reasonable, yes... but was it the truth?

"My point basically is that... why would I sleep with them anymore when ... well, I have you? You've raised my standards by quite a bit, Henrie, you know?"

I chuckled a little. "Good, good. I completely agree with your way of thinking. I hope you understand that you still have to prove yourself to me though."

"Yeah I thought so. I understand that, I guess... but I'm not worrying about that though. You can come and visit me and all that. We'll make it work. I'm not looking to sleep with just anyone anymore."

"I will visit you, Brian. You're not the only one who'll get lonely, you know? There are two people in this relationship," I reminded him.

"Yes, that's true," he agreed. "And we'll work it out. It may be a bit bumpy at times but we'll make it work."

"Please promise me you'll stay this determined even when we're going through hard times," I told him, reaching for his hand.

"I promise, Henrie," he replied, giving my hand a gentle squeeze. "I don't want to lose you again..."

"Yeah, I don't want that either. That brings me to the next thing I'm curious about."

"Mhm," he said, sounding a little sceptical. "And what is that?"

"What exactly happened between you and your ex? I know you've told me bits here and there but ... I want to know more. I don't want to accidentally make the same mistake. You don't have to tell me the details of whatever happened, but I would like to get a general idea of what happened because so far all there is in my head is confusion."