Chapter 36: Violence and Tears

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"Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage. Not weakness."

Fabian was so confused by the sight he saw in front of him. 

Jaimie-mae was literally beating one of Nicah's grown men. Her shirt was ripped and she had a few small cuts on her skin, but it looked like the guy was worse off then her.

Suddenly, the man pinned Jaimie-mae down, so Fabian immediately rushed forward and rammed his foot into the guy's side.

The guy fell off, so Fabian rushed over to help Jaimie-mae up. However, she suprised him when she brushed him off and immediately tackled the man to the ground. She threw fast punches at his face and each one made Fabian cringe.

"Yo Jaimie! What are you doing? Don't kill him!" Fabian shouted.

Fabian was shocked to see any sort of violence come from her. It wasn't like her to show any sort of hostility other than when she was having one of her flashbacks.

Fabian quickly pulled Jaimie-mae off the big dude and held her firmly by the waist. She was practically growling in his hold. Her chest rose and fell unevenly and her cheeks were flushed. Tears poured down them but she made no noise.

"Get outta here. And tell Nicah that him and his men are a bunch of frikken cowards. I can't beleive any of you would hurt a girl, especially when she's literally half your size," Fabian said angrily.

The guy got up, glared and rushed away from the scene.

"Are you okay?" Fabian asked softly.

Jaimie-mae didn't respond, so instead he led her to the car and put her in the passenger seat.

After going around and hopping in the drivers seat, he shut the door and sat back with a sigh.

"I-im sorry." Jaimie-mae's voice was barely a whisper.

Fabian snapped his head over to her. "What. Why?"

"I got angry," she said with a shaky voice.

He chuckled. "You can get angry. I know i got angry."

"I just beat up a guy. That's not okay."

"Self defense. No big deal. You just gotta promise me you won't hold on to the anger. Don't... you know, hold grudges or whatever."

She took a deep breath. "I wish t-that... shooting at my school never happened. I wish that the shooter was dead. Or i... i just, i would have killed him myself if it meant Rosay didn't have to die."

Fabian froze. Jaimie-mae had never gone into what had happened to her 2 years ago. She never spoke about it. Never explained what triggered PTSD for her. Just by her few words he could pretty much peice together what traumitized her.

"I mean. Why didn't i die like Rosay did? Why was i left here with these freakin' horrible memories?"

Tears poured down Jaimie-mae's face even more and Fabian's heart clenched. He hated the words coming out of her mouth.

"Why was i left here with the guilt. I couldn't save the one person that was supposed to be by my side. I mean, even Laura survived. Laura hated me and her. She literally pushed Rosay in front of her and got her killed. Laura only left with a bullet graze." Jaimie-mae shook her head and her fury bubbled up. "If i had the chance, i'd strangle Laura with my own bare hands. She deserves it."

Fabian winced. He'd never heard such harsh things come out of her sweet mouth. "Jaimie, listen to me. What they did was absolutely horrible. But don't wish them pain, that's not who you are. If they caused you pain, fuck them. But don't let them keep torturing you. I hate to see you like this Jaimie-baby."

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