His, Eternally [18+]

Chapter Nineteen: Wolf-Boy

Indie's Point of View:

I woke up in a cold sweat, my baby hairs that often frizzed up sticking to my forehead. My breath began to hitch as the memories as what had just happened flooded my brain. I looked around, sitting up in confusion when I realized I was in my own bed. As I glanced outside, I realized the sun was setting. After I had stayed up all night and gone on a run with the incident following, I assumed I had slept through the day. I sighed in relief realizing that I hadn't had work until Monday, three days from now. I listened to the sounds of my house, my heart dropping when I heard oddly familiar footsteps. Thaddeus appeared at the door of my bedroom, cautiously. His steps were slow, his hands tucked into his pockets. He was dressed in fitted black jeans, and the leather jacket I had slept in once before. There was slight stubble scattered across his chin and defined jaw, and it looked like he hadn't slept in days — due to the darker circles under his entrancing eyes.

"How long was I asleep for?" My voice came off as snappy and annoyed, but only because I felt scared and humiliated for being so vulnerable in front of him. I felt absolutely insane, and everything around me felt like one big simulation. This couldn't be real, or could it? "You were out for a day, little one." He said softly, taking slow steps towards the foot of my bed as I backed away from him. Fuck, why did his smell have to be so comforting? The tiny pull in my heart wanted to bring me closer to him. I felt like a fish on a line, unable to stray away or be attracted to the bait that was him. Even after all he had hurt me, had made me feel like a madwoman; I yearned to have him hug me like he did that one night. I had never forgotten it — the details of the weird tingly sensation that kissed my skin when he touched me, the way his strong arms enveloped me. It felt like he was protecting me from the cruelty of the universe. When he held me, I felt invincible, strong, and resilient — a feeling foreign to me. While looking at him, I kept trying to tell myself that he was so evil, that he was manipulative and cold hearted and absolutely, utterly insane — but the more I fell into his eyes, the harder it was to badmouth him in my head.

"You hadn't been eating. You were completely exhausted, your body looked pale from lack of nutrition. Tell me, Indie, why would you not eat?" Goosebumps rose on my skin, and I couldn't tell if it was because of the fact that he sounded concerned, or that I was cold from the breeze that gusted in through my window. Now that he had mentioned it, I hadn't been eating. When I had depressive episodes, I found it hard to do much of anything — including taking care of myself. Isolation felt like a world of darkness; and although I felt used to it, I never had developed particularly good coping mechanisms. I never knew anyone like me, driving me further down the rabbit-hole that was my sadness. "I just forget sometimes." I mumbled, looking at the timeless sun that was lowering slowly. The sky looked like it had been painted with water color, and the outline of the mountains in front of the sun stood out immensely.

"Can I make you something to eat then, Indie? Then I will explain everything."

I nodded slowly, pulling my crème colored duvet to my shoulders, where I then proceeded to rest my head on my knees. He smiled lightly, before leaving my room. I felt too shocked to say no, and drained from my energy. I was in a state of sensory-overload, due to everything that had happened just a day ago. I didn't have the fight in me to tell him to get out, much less argue with his offer. In just minutes, he brought out a grilled cheese that smelled way too good as well as tomato soup, and a cut up apple. He poured me a large glass of water, handing it to me as I accepted cautiously. Why was he being so calm all of a sudden? I assumed he would be angry at me for not eating, and for not taking care of myself. Instead, he looked at me with sorrowful eyes and concerned as I ate.

"I tried to find some protein, but there was nothing in there. No meat or anything." He sat down at the chair that was beside my bed, the chair he had sat in while I slept just weeks earlier. He was smart to keep his distance, but a part of me still wanted him closer. I shook the thoughts away, attempting not to space out despite the tiredness that lingered my body.

"Yeah, I'm vegetarian." I laughed, my face flushing as loud growl rumbled in my belly. He chuckled at my face as I looked away, cursing my stomach silently as I tried to wipe away the embarrassment that began to cloud my mind. "You don't eat meat?" He asked, scoffing in a playful matter as he studied me while I ate, making sure I consumed all of the food he had made for me. I nodded, savoring the delectable taste. I was so distracted by the food as well as his beauty that I couldn't even think of the fact that he had literally transformed into a wolf twenty-four hours before. "Good to know, little one."

"Stop calling me that. It feels quite patronizing."

"I find it hard to, frankly. And Indie, in no way would I ever mean to patronize you. When I say that, it's not because I think you're weak. You're a strong, resilient woman. I just say that because, well, you're a bit small for having such a powerful and outspoken voice." My heart fluttered from his words, until I heard the last of what he said. "I am not small. Everyone else is just tall, especially here." I huffed. He chuckled in response. "That's exactly what I mean."

I felt a small smile form on my slightly chapped lips. Maybe I was acting so nice to him because I was tired, or maybe because I felt like I needed him to be there; with me. I finished my food as we sat there in silence, feeling suddenly paranoid that I could have soup on my chin or food in my teeth due to the way he studied me. "You are beautiful." He said, his voice low and gruff. His eyes began to lighten as my pulse quickened, smiling more when he saw me look down nervously. He was complimenting me? I had never been called beautiful before by a man, I had only heard nasty, graphic things said about me in the minds of men and boys. My stomach was far past from having butterflies in it — it felt much more powerful than that. I tried to think of something to say, but every time I opened my mouth I quickly shut it — afraid to make the sweet moment turn awkward. I didn't understand how he thought that, I must've looked absolutely heinous. I hadn't seen myself, but I could imagine my hair was tangled, and my face pale with dark circles lining my eyes.

"You don't have to reply, Indie. Surely you know it." My eyes widened even more from his comment. I traced the flower pattern of my sheets that were hidden under my duvet. He was so handsome, I couldn't fully wrap my mind around why he would call me pretty. I shook the thoughts from my head, scolding myself internally. He was too damn charming for me to hate him.

"You're beautiful too, wolf-boy." I blurted out, breaking the silence that filled the air. My face felt like it was on fire, slapping my hand over my mouth in embarrassment. Really, Indie, really? He chuckled in amusement, looking at me wondrously. Despite the fact that I was now completely and utterly avoiding eye-contact with him, I could somehow sense that his eyes were lit up, and that a smirk was splayed across his plush lips. Plush lips? Why the fuck did I just think that? 

"Thank you, little one." He chuckled again, which was, by the way, the most melodious sound that has ever blessed my ears. "Wolf-boy?" He said, questioning my choice of words. "I didn't know what to say, and uh, yeah."

I was so fucking awkward, lord help me please.