Just Something about You

Part 40 - Crossing the line

The beach was quiet. There were only a few people left chatting and some hotel staff clearing up and packing up the chairs.

Millie listened to the sound of the waves, every now and again there was a slightly larger wave that made a louder crash scaring her a little, although there were some lights on the beach none of them reached as far as the shoreline, it was too dark to see the sea.

Mac and a couple of other crew members we're packing all their instruments and equipment up, besides them only Jesse and Lilia were left on the beach. It was approaching 12.15am most of the wedding party and guests had all gone onto bed.

Millie pretended to not see Jesse and Lilia kiss. Feeling a little awkward she kept her head down picking up plastic cups from the sand but she couldn't help sneak a look out of the corner of her eye. For some reason she felt a little jealous. Lilia was young, blonde and beautiful. She made Millie feel old!

She could see them talking but she wasn't quite in ear shot. After a minute or so she noticed Lilia leave, as soon as she was out of sight Jesse began to walk towards her, she pretended not to notice.

"Hey Mil, let me give you a hand with that" he said brushing her hand with his as he took a stack of cups from her arms. She looked up at him. He looked gorgeous, in a cobalt blue suit, with a crisp white shirt. His long fringe gelled back up on top of his head, with one long strand falling out of place over his face.

"Oh thanks" she replied, pretending to be pleasantly surprised.

She continued picking up more cups but he lingered next to her, forcing her to look up at him again

"Alright?" She asked. Jesse hesitated

"Yeah, uh...come here please, Mil" he held onto Millie's arm and pulled her away from the other people who were still packing up and out of sight of Mac.

Millie stood waiting for Jesse to talk, nervous, wondering what he was going to say.

As soon as they were out of earshot and out of the lights he took her hand. Millie's heart began to race. She had no idea what he was doing.

"Millie.." he started, putting his other hand to her chin like she was 5 years old.

"I haven't stopped thinking about you" He admitted. His voice was quiet and a little shaken. She wondered how much he had had to drink... or worse!

"Jess, you're just drunk!" Said Millie leaning back from him and the strong smell of alcohol on him. Still holding her hand he pulled her back in.

"I'm not drunk, Lilia spilled a drink down me, that's it I swear, you can ask Mac he's never going to let me drink is he!" he said. His face serious, he appeared to be telling the truth.

"But you're here with a new girlfriend, Olivia or whatever her name is" Millie knew her name

"It's Lilia, she means nothing to me, she's just been keeping on and on at me for a date so i gave in so I wouldn't have to come to this alone" he admitted

"So why are you telling me this Jess? I've heard nothing from you for weeks" Said Millie, feeling a little annoyed with him, he seemed to only want her when it suited him.

"I know, I'm sorry Mil" he said, she looked at the floor. He put his hand on her chin and gently pulled her face up to look at him. She couldn't help but turn to jelly looking into his deep brown eyes, there was just something about him she found totally irresistible. He could treat her like crap, mess her around, pick her up, put her down but still stood before him she couldn't resist him.

"What do you want Jess?" She sighed, as gorgeous as he was and as much as her heart was telling her she wanted to be more than friends she was at a stage in her life where she didn't want to be messed around. She had become used to being treated like a princess by Dex and by Ricco, she'd dated players and bad boys in the past and always ended up heart broken, she was sure that that was exactly the route she'd be heading down if she had pursued something with Jesse.

"I don't know" he groaned, he seemed tormented by it. Millie didn't know what to say

"I have thought about you every second of every day since the last time I saw you, I've wrote out texts a million times and never pressed send, I've dialled your number in the middle of the night and then stopped, I've written songs about you!" He admitted

"You can't do that! Dex is going to figure that out!

"I told him the songs were for my mom, he thought nothing of it" Jesse explained. Before Millie could reply Jesse took her hand again and placed it on his chest. Millie felt the butterflies flood her stomach. She needed to walk away before anything happened, she didn't want this! She was insanely in love with Dex, nothing good could come from this! But despite these thoughts going round her head she couldn't bring herself to leave, or even take her hand off his chest.

Jesse pulled her in close so her body was against his. He stared down into her eyes, she loved how tall he was, taller than Dex. He made her feel like he could protect her from anything. She liked that feeling.

He tilted his head slightly, still staring deep into her eyes.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! thought Millie as he leaned in, she felt his lips touch hers, and that was it, the damage was done. It felt so strange to kiss someone new. Her body trembling she felt her fingers shake, she struggled to keep hold of his hand as electricity flooded her veins. She knew it was wrong, she knew she was ruining everything good in her life, she knew she was ruining a relationship, a friendship, a band, everything but as the hairs stood up on the back of her neck as his hand moved up to the sides of her face, everything else in her life fell away, nothing existed, her mind had been wiped clean of the last 26 years, the only thing that she could remember was the feel of him as he stepped into her.

She had a split second to make a decision, pull away or let it be.

Her heart decided on the latter.

She put all her thoughts, doubts and guilt to the back of her mind and for a moment forgot that anyone else existed.....he was such a good kisser, gentle but dominant, he slid his hand up around the back of her head, entangling his fingers in her hair, his other arm casually hanging beside him as if he was so strong he only needed one hand. Millie couldn't help but think how effortlessly cool he was, he didn't even try but he was so sexy. He stepped further into her pressing himself up against her body, he kissed more forcefully filling her mouth with his tongue..

until someone dropped a stack of chairs, Millie jumped, and quickly moved away from him, having forgotten there were still people around.

At that moment she was hit with her conscience with the force of a steam train. What was she doing? She couldn't do this, if she did, it couldn't be undone, she'd always have a secret from Dex, lies, she'd have cheated and there was no going back from that once it was done. She stepped back further away from him, suddenly everything she felt a second ago had left her body, replaced by a guilt that made her limbs feel heavy.

"I'm sorry Jess, I can't do this!" She said, bursting into tears as she turned away from him and ran back towards the hotel.

Jesse stood shocked; he didn't see that coming. He slouched down and sat on the sand resting his head in hands. He sighed heavily. Already feeling guilty for what he'd attempted to do Why do I always get myself in these situations?! He thought. He'd tried it on with his best friends girl. That was a new low, even for him.

He sat for a long while just listening to the ocean, thinking, wishing; he could sort his life out once and for all. He knew he needed to leave her alone but wasn't sure that he could, his feelings for her were stronger than ever, thoughts started to circle in his head. Should he leave the band? Was that going to be the only way to leave her alone, to preserve his friendship with Dex, if there was any of it left