Love Me.

Part 36

KHUSHI

I blinked my eyes severally, everything seemed blurry and I felt a strong pain at the top of my head, I sat up wondering what was happening to me suddenly.

A few moments later, memories of last night started sinking in, no wonder I was feeling this way, after that amount of drink, I was bound to feel this way, and then to make it worse, I remembered what I did last night.

I called Arnav! Holy Shit! I didn't just call him, but when he showed up I actually broke up with him. Oh God, what did I do?

I stood up and started pacing around my room nervously, what the hell was wrong with me? Firstly, I confessed my love to him and then I broke up with him, what was I doing here? I know maybe it was the right decision for me, but I shouldn't have made it when I was drunk.

I grabbed my phone and stared at the screen just in case he had sent me any texts or anything but there was nothing, well it looked like I gave him what he wanted, freedom from me, without the guilt that he left me after all the promises he made to me.

I thought breaking up with him would make this pain less, it would hurt less but clearly it hadn't made any difference, if anything, it had made the pain worse. I didn't know how to deal with this pain, so I dealt with it the only way I knew how. Music.

I played the playlist of Darshan's songs and placed the phone back on the stand and headed to take a shower, I needed to freshen up, I needed to get back to work and concentrate on it forgetting about Arnav, that was the only way I could deal with this.

I stood under the shower as the warm water fell down on me while I listened to the music, since the time I became obsessed with Darshan and his music, it was always about how beautifully he sang, how I always loved all his songs because they never disappointed me, it was always about music really I never cared much about the lyrics.

But now that I had had my heart broken for the first time ever in life, somehow the lyrics to his songs started making so much sense, it was like the songs were written just for the situation I was in.

I shut my eyes remembering that day when Arnav and I showered together, he had promised me he would fall in love with me, well turns out it was just a lie right?

Juthi thi kasmein teri, juthe vaade sabhi, juthi teri hasi aur juthe the ansu tere...
Ab yaadon me aunga mein, rehjayegi meri kami, sazayein bhi bolegi tujhko yeh kya kiya, tune kiya...
Kaash aisa bhi hota... tum mere hote... me tumhara hota... to yeh ghum na hote....

I walked out of the shower and got dressed, I stood in front of the mirror and stared at my reflection, my puffy eyes scared me so bad. This wasn't me, I wasn't someone that lived in pain, I was someone that spent days crying, I loved life, I loved everything about it and I was always so happy, how did I become like this?

"Khushi?" Manvi knocked at the door of my room.

"Yeah."

"There's someone here to see, can you come out?"

"Okay, I'll be there in two minutes." I said wondering who it was, I was sure it wasn't Arnav because Manvi wouldn't even let him in let alone come tell me that he was here so I could talk to him.

I grabbed my concealer and dabbed it under my eyes and every area around it that looked puffy, once I felt like I looked a bit normal, I headed outside to see who it was.

I found Barkha seated on the sofa and the only question I had was why was she even here? Had Arnav sent her here or something? He wouldn't do that unless he was in love with me and if he was in love with me he could just come say that himself and the whole problem would be solved right? But this wasn't it, it definitely seemed something else.