A Song of Silence

Chapter 38: Truths in the Dark

The Grand Assassin found me days later, huddled in an alley for warmth. He took me in, even as I fought him every step of they way. Every act of rebellion was met with harsh punishments, leaving scars in their wake. That ribbon of my mothers? he used it to string me up on the ceiling during said punishments. My stuffed animal? He set it on fire in front of me. Still, I never ceased to fight him. To rebel. Even as my mothers memories faded and I could no longer remember the exact shade of her eyes or her smile when I would make her dinner after a long day.

I never stopped. Until I made a friend. I'm a time and place when I shouldn't have. When I should have known better. I stopped rebelling when the Grand Assassin made me kill her. It was her life or mine and if anything, I was a survivor. I never forgot her name though. Jessa. She was kind, but frail and had a fragile heart. The Assassins keep was no place for a child like her. So it broke and killed her. After Jessa died, I stopped. Stopped thinking. Stopped rebelling. Stopped feeling. The Grand Assassin used me to do his dirty work. To kill whoever he wished. I did as he asked, even after a little part of me dyed every time I spat on my mothers dying wish when I did as he asked.

It wasn't until years later that I learned of my true heritage. That the fae female I called mother was not my biological mother, but was instead a prostitute who gave me up the first chance she got and that my true father was the man that had whipped and beat me into submission all those years ago. It mattered little to me, of course. Blood doesn't define you, merely the family you make along the way. In that regard, the fae woman who had adopted me was my only true family.

For years I had searched for the fae who had betrayed my mother and I all those years ago. I had planned elaborate torture and pain for the betrayer for over four hundred years, yet now that I knew the truth, I was empty. Not angry or vengeful. Just empty. I did not blame High Queen Sylvia for her betrayal. She was put into an arraigned marriage and was nursing a broken heart. Her state of mind was obviously not the best and I truly could not blame her for her treachery. Now that I knew the truth and had absolutely no wish for revenge, I didn't know what to do with myself. Other than my obligation to find a replacement for myself as Karasi's healer, I truly had no other plans for what would come after. And to be perfectly honest with myself, I didn't know what to do about it.

Sitting on the palace walls, lost in thought and pondering whether I should still stay in the palace, I didn't hear the footsteps that approached. "Never thought I'd see you out here," a familiar voice said. Adonis. We had rarely spoken since that dance during the ball, all those weeks ago. Once I had joined the inner circle, Adonis's facade of friendliness and flirting meant for those he needed information from quickly vanished and was instead replaced with a cold, dark, uncaring demeanor. We had rarely talked since that facade had faded and I did not seek him out as a friend, or even a fellow inner circle member. I regretted making an enemy of him so early, but I had no patience for those who acted as anything but what they were. Adonis did that on a daily basis, so I made sure to steer clear of him.

I merely ignore Adonis, hoping he will go away and leave me with my morose thoughts once more. He does the opposite. In fact he smirks at me and sits next to me on the stone wall. "Karasi's been looking everywhere for you."

My company is not something she'd like right about now.

"Any particular reason why?" He asks trying to get me to spill my secrets. Always the spymaster. I tell him just that. He merely responds with, "Always the spy." He is no doubt expecting me to panic at his observation. To run and escape while I can. I do no such thing.

Not anymore.

His brows knit in confusion, "Nobody earns their freedom from the Grand Assassin."