A Song of Silence

Chapter 67: Acceptance in the Dark

Thank You to @Ranila12389 for reading A Song of Silence! Your support means the world to me!

I was woken with a warm body pressed next to me. Well, two warm bodies. One was covered in fur and licked me awake in the early hours of the morning. The other was much more heavily muscled and had gleaming silver eyes. I pushed Akilahs heavy body and enthusiastic licking away with a smile. She had grown bigger in the past few weeks. No as much as I would have liked, but she was strong and smarter than many of her siblings. I was happy to be woken up by her, even if it was earlier than I would have liked. The sudden motion made my ribs twinge in agony. They had yet to fully heal over the night and the bruises and cuts I had acquired yesterday had yet to heal fully as well.

My sudden motion and Akilah woke the second person sleeping next to me, Azazel. His silver eyes snapped open in surprise and quickly changed to worry when he saw me clutching at my ribs. Then, fury overcame their molten depths. "Who," he says quietly, his voice strained with barely concealed rage. Shit. My bruises. They hadn't fully healed during the night. "Who did that to you!" He asks again, his voice louder.

"Nobody," I say, turning away. I hadn't ever been ashamed of my injuries before, but with Azazel I found myself wanting to be perfect, and these bruises were anything but. With gentle hands, Azazel turned my face back towards his. I expected to see pity in his eyes and a little remorse. Instead, I saw all encompassing rage. A rage I had never seen on his face. One of vengeance and ruthlessness. The Dark King looked back at me, for a moment, before the Azazel I knew returned to his eyes and he asked again, "Who did this to you?"

I try to turn my face away, but he refuses to let me feel my shame. "I'm not going to tell you, so you might as well stop asking." I say simply. Unconsciously, I try to pull the bedsheet up to my chest. The Capital is hot, so my nightclothes are relatively sheer and they would show each and every one of my bruises and cuts. I don't need another reason for Azazel's fury to rise once again.

Perceptive as ever, Azazel noticed my movements and asked, "Are they all over your body? He grabs the sheet and tries to pull it off me, but I fight him. His brows crease in frustration before he looks back up at me and says, "You have nothing to be ashamed of firefly. You are beautiful and extraordinary, bruises or not." His kind words break the barrier I had been trying to put up between us. A barrier of shame and secrets. I can't hide anything from this male, no matter how hard I try. Slowly Azazel pulls the sheet down until it exposes the rest of my bruised body. My nightclothes cover some of them, but not all. He gasps at the extent of them before asking, "How have they healed so well?"

I was so scared of his reaction to my bruises, it took me a while to respond, "I gave an ointment that helps to heal such things. I left it on the nightstand next to you." He looks over and sure enough, the small jar lays there, the ointment slightly used, but still mostly there.

Turning back to me, Azazel asks, "Do you trust me?" I look up into the molten depths of his eyes and the concern laying within. Did I trust him. Without a doubt and I was tired of denying it. Nodding once, Azazel grabs the ointment from the bedside table. He motions his head towards the full length mirror in front of the closet. Understanding he wants me to go stand in front of it, I do so. What is this all about. The mirror shows the truth of my well-worn state. The bags under my eyes are dark and my entire body is still swollen and mottled with bruises and cuts of every size and shape. Azazel approaches me from behind, shirtless, but still in his silk pajama pants, with the jar in one hand. Meeting my eyes in the mirror, he lays a kiss on one of the bruises close to my shoulder blade. I stiffen in surprise and shock. I shouldn't let him do this. I am supposed to break his heart in less than two weeks, not fall further in love with him.

Yet, I let his skilled hands and mouth roam my body. Kiss by kiss. It is not a kiss to inspire desire, or arousal. No, instead it's a kiss of comfort and understanding. A kiss that says he won't push me further, but that he'll always be there for me. Kisses that say he sees every inch of me and accepts me just the way I am. Ever so slowly, Azazel slides the spaghetti strap of my top off my shoulder and then does the same with the other, all the while meeting my eyes in the mirror. My nightclothes fall to the floor, exposing me to his silver eyes. What looks like admiration and pride shines in their depths.

Tears spring to my eyes, but he quickly wiped them away, "You are deserving of every bit of the acceptance I give you and don't ever let yourself think otherwise." With that he dips his fingers into the medicine balm and applies it to the bruised skin that he just kissed. Throughout, his calm, careful movements evoke a sense of calm into me. A sense of peace. That kind of peace is hard to come by. It's a peace I'll have to part with in less with two weeks time. Sadness and regret threaten to overtake the calm mood that Azazel put me in. I refuse to let it, for the moment at least, and enjoy the careful and fragile way in which Azazel rubs the medicine on my skin.

Once he is done, Azazel grabs the nightclothes and slides them back up my worn body. I turn to him and say quietly, "Thank You."

He only nods in response and says, "You deserve to have someone you know you can trust, no matter what. I will always be that for you, even if you don't wish me to be." I don't know what to say to his words, so I only nod in response. Kissing me on the cheek, Azazel wraps himself in shadows and shadow walks himself out of my rooms. I can't help but mourn his presence and the calm I feel when he is around. Shrugging off my nightclothes, I throw on a fancy dress and put my hair up. Makeup can only cover so much of my bruises, so I get ready for the day and head for the kitchens.

Melanie will be there before she goes to her classes later tonight. Usually a healer takes tears to complete their courses at the university. Melanie, though is speeding through her classes and is set to graduate within the year. With any luck she will be prepared enough to take care of Karasi when I have to leave in a few weeks. Hopefully. Knowing exactly where Melanie will be, I make my way there, trying to not alert attention as I go. I am somewhat unsuccessful in that endeavor. A pretty fae woman in nice clothes is hard to miss in a kitchen full of servants. Still, Melanie notices my presence and beckons me towards the back where we will not be seen or heard.

"Aerilynn! Is everything alright?" She asks quietly. I can tell she is worried for me because her brows scrunch together between her brows and she looks at me cautiously. Well, she looks at my bruises cautiously. They wouldn't be that obvious to servants who had rarely seen me up close, but to Melanie, at least, it was as plain as day.

Yes, everything is fine Melanie. I just need you to cast a glamour over my face until these bruises heal. I know you won't tell anyone about them, so I need you to over them. I say gesturing you to the swelling and dark patches across my face and body.

"I'm not the best at glamours Aerilynn," she says hesitantly.

Please, Melanie. I need to look somewhat decent for the High Queens tea party today. I'll be torn apart by the nobles if I even have a scratch. I beg. I have nobody else to go to unfortunately. Melanie reluctantly agrees and places the glamor over my body. Its not perfect, but it'll have to do for now. Thanking Melanie, I head out of the kitchens and prepare myself for the tea party ahead and the High Queen that heads it. Fuck