New Desires

Chapter 33 part 1

After we got home, I told Imogen about what happened with Mrs. B. She even agreed her knowing was in itself gonna be torture. She cannot keep her mouth shut. Hopefully she isn't too focused on us- although, I'd doubt it. Everyone at the party was obsessed with Zara's presence. People asked for pictures and her work and her life. It was like an interview only snobby bottom of the barrel rich people trying to get by with the richest of their peers. I'm pretty sure half of the people there didn't even like the other half. They were fighting for her attention like children, It was insane.

"I don't mind." Zara shrugged walking into the bathroom.

"But my mother used you for her own personal gain. I wouldn't want our lives to always be like that. MY mother trying to use your status for her own personal gain forever? That's so annoying and inconsiderate of her." I undressed as I spoke to her.

She peered her head out of the door with a corny little smirk on her face, "Forever?"

    I rolled my eyes, "Whatever."

    She walks out with her hair tied up and a pair of shorts on. "I understand what you mean though, princess. I guess you're right, It would get annoying. I just wanted to make a good impression for the first time really getting to know your family."

"Yeah, I know. And they seemed to have loved you, even my dad." I slip into a pair of plaid pajama pants and a tank top and go to the bathroom.

"It's a shame your brother's girlfriend couldn't make it though." I hear Zara shout to me.

"Yeah, I wanted to meet her really bad, But, he said definitely New Year's Eve so we have that to look forward to." I shrugged, not that she could see.

After getting ready for bed we laid together for a minute. Nothing sexual, she held me as I listened to her heart beat underneath me. Her steady breathing practically rocking me to sleep as I intertwined my legs between hers and wrapped my arms around her waist, shutting my eyes and falling in love with moments like these. Just being able to be with her at nights. 6 months of this. And yet it feels like I had been in love with her since before I even knew love existed. Being with her feels like how you would define love to be. I have never been this utterly comfortable with someone before. All these kinks? I can't imagine anyone performing them on me other than her. She fuels the side of me I had never been open to exploring before, but, it's so easy with Zara. With Lynx, all we ever did was fight. If I didn't do what he wanted me to do, as he wanted me to do it, all hell would break loose. If I didn't wanna do something, It didn't really matter because either he or my father wanted it to happen. We were only touchy in public or when he wanted us to be. It felt like torture being with him. But not with her. Never. I never genuinely questioned if she really wanted me. I never had to beg to be loved by her, to feel needed or touched gently. She knew what I needed even if I didn't say it- I've never really had to tell her, she just knew me like that.

    I have never been loved like this before- by anyone, platonically or romantically. She feels safe- kind of like how you would feel as a kid when you held close your stuffed animal or baby blanket, but, better. She felt like home, and I would go back to her even if she didn't have the money and the luxury and James. I know that with her, I will always be heard.

     "WAKE UP!" I hear someone shutting above me.

     I feel someone shaking me awake. It couldn't have been Zara because my arms are still wrapped around her. My eyes fluttered open to Imogen above my face.

    "It's CHRISTMAS STUPID GET UP!" She climbs on top of me and tickles my abdomen causing me to immediately be bolted with adrenaline and try to get her off of me.