013. terrible fathers

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"Guys?" Dean calls as they return to the bunker. Chuck and Lucifer are in the war room and Lucifer is sitting on the steps to the library with Chuck standing in front of him.

"Hey, how's it goin' in here?" Sam asks.

"Listen, I know I've been gone for a while." Chuck tells Lucifer. "I've missed a few... million... birthdays--"

"Yeah, and the second your apes send a distress flare, boom, daddy's home." Lucifer quips.

"That's not what happened." Chuck argues.

"Hey, these apes saved your ass." Dean says.

Lucifer glares at him and snaps his fingers. The hunters flinch and Sam grabs onto the twins, backing up towards Larissa who is holding Athena. They quickly realize that nothing happened to them.

"He can't hurt you." Chuck says.

"Oh, so you're controlling me now." Lucifer turns to his father.

"It's just a safeguard." Chuck says.

"Hey guys? Uh, Chuck? Lucifer. Uh, everybody." Sam says. "Think we can try and focus here? You know, end of the world, common enemy, all that?"

"Enemy of my enemy is my friend." Lucifer says as he stands in front of Chuck. "Team Amara. Go Amara."

"You don't mean that." Chuck says.

"You're really not gonna say it." Lucifer says, the two staring at each other.

"He's not gonna say what?" Sam asks.

"Screw you." Lucifer tells Chuck. "Screw all of you." He tells the others before storming out.

"Kids, huh?" Chuck asks. "I'm sure you guys get it." He walks off.

"No they don't." Libby glares at his retreating figure.

Sam and Larissa share a knowing look.

"You're adorable when you lie." Jacob tells his niece making her glare at him.

+++

Sam, Dean, and Larissa are standing outside of the bedroom as Lucifer blasts rock music.

"Lucifer!" Sam shouts, banging on the door. "You know, sometime you're gonna have to come out and talk to... God." He doesn't get a response.

"It's like the worst episode of Full House ever." Dean says. The music turns off.

"If dad has something to say to me, I'll hear it from him! Until then, I'll be in my room." Lucifer says, turning the music back on.

"Compared to him, our kids are actually a picnic." Larissa says.

"It--" Sam starts.

"It's not your room." Dean says.

"It's our room." The couple chorus. Sam bangs on the door.

"Whatever." Dean walks off, the couple following.

"We are burning everything. Buying everything new." Larissa declares.

+++

"Talk to him." Sam tells Chuck.

"Won't do any good." Chuck says.

"Why not?" Sam asks.

"Because I can't give him what he wants." Chuck says.

"And what the hell does he want, exactly?" Ophelia asks.

"What everyone wants. My sister, my children, you humans -- an apology. A big, wet "I'm sorry."" Chuck says.

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