Finding Home (Completed)

Chapter XXXVI

Iri sat perched on the railing of the balcony just off her chambers, fingers brushing lightly over the smooth stone. She reflected on the last few years of her life, visions dancing before her eyes. She'd walked the earth through the ages and proceeded too late when action was demanded of her. Yet still, her sins paled in comparison to the chaos that would engulf the world, should Fen'Harel be allowed to proceed with his plans. He didn't fully understand the degree of destruction he would cause, but it also wasn't a concern. She huffed bitterly, "Fool girl." she grumbled into her tea, emptying the cup and placing it on the railing. She hopped down, leaning on her elbows while her eyes flitted across the gardens.

She was lost for a moment, taking solace in the beauty, quietly existing amongst the unrest of the city. She jumped when a hand landed on her shoulder, twisting and pushing herself away. "Oh!" she exclaimed when she caught sight of Fenris, "Vhenan? It is unlike you to be startled, are you felling well?" Concern crossing his face as he attempted to put his palm to her forehead. She swatted it away, "Perhaps I have grown too comfortable with you, wolf." she teased, giggling into the back of her hand. Fenris growled playfully, making grabs for her a few times before Iri allowed herself to be caught. They laughed, hugging one another before catching each others eye.

"So tell me, then." he requested, not losing sight of his original thought. She sighed, a slight furrow coming to her brow, "I have seen it, I know what comes, in ever instance, yet I still find playing god, to be quite...unsavoury." she replied, rubbing her eyes with the tips of her fingers before turning away, leaning again on the railing. "What decision do you question, emma lath?" he wondered, moving to lean beside her, reaching out his hand to stroke her cheek. "None of them....all of them...." She sighed heavily, shoulders slumping forward. Fenris wrapped his arm around her, giving her a gently squeeze. "I can not offer an opinion on things I know nothing of, Vhenan. But I am willing to listen if you care to share in your burden." he said softly, looking to the sky and shielding his eyes with his hand.

"Look, Vhenan." he said and she followed his finger to where he pointed. "I see only clouds and sky, ma'fen." she replied, squinting to catch a glimpse of what he saw. "Exactly." he stated as she looked to him for an explanation. He chuckled softly, turning around and leaning back. "It's the little things we take for granted, the clouds, the sky, a moment of time with a loved one." he elaborated, staring at her affectionately. "Are you sure about this, Dumat I mean, you do not have to oblige my request." He thought on her words for a moment, curious as to why she would ask. "What happens if I don't?" he inquired. "Two possibilities. The first, I will attempt to claim his soul, in which I will succeed. But, in my tainted state, I will not survive long enough to purge the corruption and you will lack the power to save me without him. The second, we leave him be and Fen'Harel will come for him later. Either option ends poorly for us."

He blinked at her, neither option she presented offered much in the way of comfort. "Then I am sure." he stated, confident in his decision. "You are extraordinary, do you know that?" she spoke softly, but with an intensity that sent a shudder through his body. He fought the urge to ravish her as he took note of the sorrow in her expression. He pursed his lips slightly, "There is more." he spoke with conviction as he laced his fingers through her, sending a reassuring look her way. "I should be angry, should I not? Be resentful.....something! But yet, here I stand, knowing what I do and none the less, I may possibly love him more now, than ever. I mean, I suppose I am angry, but not nearly to the degree one would expect. It sickens me to think I will challenge my maker, our maker........" She paused, looking at Fenris as her thoughts shifted.

"What are your feelings in this matter, ma'fen?" she asked, a pang of remorse striking her as she realized how selfish she'd been, not thinking to ask. "I could only respond, that I am doing my best to take this in stride. This entire thing almost feels surreal to me and I am unsure of where we all fit in. You have insight, Vhenan, I would very much appreciate you keeping me informed." Essentially, that was the answer she'd expected, but regardless, it hurt no less. She felt like she'd betrayed him, and in a way, she had, inadvertently. In an attempt to spare him the burden, she'd denied him the knowledge she'd have demanded from him. But he did not demand, not Fenris, it was far worse to let one know your disappointment.