The Chase ▹ Ashton Irwin

CHAPTER THIRTY EIGHT

Ashton didn't look at me. He stared down at his shaking hands, sniffling obvious tears every couple of seconds. I didn't know what to say, so I just stared at him, my mouth agape.

What the fuck did I just listen to? That can't be true, it just can't be. Jessie was one of the sweetest people I've ever met...It just..it can't be. 

But, by the Ashton sat there, almost too ashamed to look me in the eyes, and the way I could tell he was on the verge of sobbing, I knew it was all fucking true. It was allso very, fucking true, and I wanted to throw up at how fucked up that is.

"I..." My voice trailed off for a little. "Ashton-"

Before I could finish whatever was coming out of my mouth, Ashton's head shot up, his glossy eyes piercing into me. Tears were streaming down his face and I was starting to feel even more sick my stomach.

"You know not everything bad that happens to people is my fault." was all he said. His voice was quiet, yet there was so much emotion in his few words that made my heart break. I knew exactly who and what he was thinking about, and it wasn't just Jessie. My heart was fastly breaking with each second that passed. Ashton was shaking and breathing inbetween little sobs, and i didn't know what to do. 

So, I just looked at him and opened my arms for him. He instantly let out a cry and crashed into my body, burying his face in the crook of my neck. I was utterly surprised at this, because I've never seen Ashton so upset and so vunerable before. I lightly rubbed his back, letting him continue to cry.

Once again, it wasn't fair. Jessie was obviously just a fucking idiot and didn't know what the fuck to do with herself. Why did she blame Ashton for everything, and be so fucking mean about it? He was just being her friend, and helping her get self confidence. It wasn't his fault! It wasn't at all.

I could just tell that Ashton was thinking about his parents right now. He probably thought that was all his fault, too. But it wasn't. He was fucking six years old, how could it be his fault? There was no explanation for it, yet Ashton still seemed to feel that way. He was still sobbing, and it made my heart break more and more as minutes passed. The boy who had protected me from getting my ass kicked last month and today, was crying.

"Ashton." I said. 

He didn't answer.

"Ashton." I said a little bit louder. 

Still, the cries weren't stopping. I cupped his face in my hands and brought it to mine, our eyes level and our foreheads touching. His eyes were red and puffy, and I could feel his racing pulse on his neck.

"Listen to me," I said. "None of it, and I mean none of it, was your fault. Do you understand me?"

"How do you know?" Ashton sniffled, sitting up to face me.

"Because she's fucking ridiculous!" I said in frustration. No one was home yet, so I didn't care how loud I was. My voice was startng to shake, but I knew I couldn't cry. I needed to be strong right now. "Look, she didn't tell me any of this. She told me you were disgusting and she hated you, which isn't true, but she never told me any of that. I'm glad she didn't, because she would've told me some fake ass story. Almost as fake as herself."

My last words made Ashton let out a small chuckle, but he was still wiping tears from his eyes. I decided to keep talking.

"I don't think you're a jerk, or a monster, or that you ruined Jessie's life. I think the complete opposite, actually. Obviously, she did it to herself. And if anyone ever tells you that you're not caring, or compassionate, or sensitive, then they're fucking wrong. Because you are all those things, and thats something I really adore about you."