silence. as usual. but this silence was even better. because during this silence, josh saw the corners of rosemary's lips turned up without her even realizing it. it out a smile on his face. he didn't care if it was the trip or him causing this, but he wanted to make it permanent. he didn't want some trip to influence her happiness, he wanted to do that. he wanted it to be his responsibility to make her happy and to make sure she was always okay, and if she wasn;t, she wanted it to be his responsibility to be there for her. he didn't really consider the fact most people call that a relationship, he had learned he wasn't really one for labels. something about rosemary told him she was the same.
they had been staring at the new york skyline for hours, and it was clear neither of them was bored. rosemary stayed still, only adjusting herself so she was closer to josh. her legs curled up to her chest with them now leaning against the windshield, it was the most comfortable josh had been in a while. josh looked down to rosemary every so often, just as a little reminder that she was there. it was nice to just have someone there. no words necessary, nothing but just someone's presence.
when he looked down for about the thousandth time, he noticed her eyes were closed. her chest rose and fell at a normal pace, her knee wasn't bouncing as they usually did, her hands weren't slightly shaking, she was just calm.
josh bit his lip and carefully twisted his body so he could hook his arm under her already bent knees, sliding off the roof of the car with her in his arms. unconsciously, rosemary loosely moved her arms around josh's neck, nuzzling into his chest. josh also noticed she was seemingly more awake in her sleep. she'd never knowingly curl up to josh like this, it made her seem weak. her words, not his.
josh managed to open the car door and place her in the passenger's seat, buckling the seatbelt across her torso carefully not to wake her. he then jogged to the trunk of the car and quietly opened his suitcase, pulling out the blanket he had brought 'just in case.' as soon as he tossed the blanket over her, she immediately pulled it around her and turned on her side in the seat, causing josh to laugh a bit. once he closed the door, he took out his phone and looked for the nearest hotel.
josh took his sweet time on the road, avoiding every possible pothole and bump, a certain song popping into his head as he drove. ironically, he did kind of hate the government for wasting so much tax money on trivial things instead of fixing the roads.
soon enough josh found a hotel on the outskirts of the city, which actually didn't look too scummy. when he parked, out of the corner of his eye he saw rosemary slightly jolt. josh frowned a bit and looked her way, taking the keys out of the ignition and unbuckling himself. her eyes were now open, and she was looking around and down at the blanket covering her. when she made eye contact with josh, all he saw was confusion and fear.
"you alright?" josh questioned, keeping his tone quiet not to startle her. rosemary nodded her head quickly and waved him off, sighing as she stretched her arms out in front of her. "sorry, i just didn't want to wake you up when you looked so peaceful."
rosemary only shook her head and got out of the car, stumbling a bit as she caught her balance. josh chuckled a bit and rushed out of the car himself, seeing her shoulders shake. her teeth chattered, immediately worrying josh. "oh, take the blanket, you must be freezing." josh pointed inside the now off car, and rosemary obeyed. she first got her backpack out of the trunk and threw it over her shoulders along with the blanket. josh did the same, dragging his suitcase behind him as he followed rosemary inside the lobby, the smell of new paint and wood surprisingly not bothering josh. he signed in for them at the front desk and took whatever room was available.
their room, unbeknownst to them, only had one bed and a chair at the desk in the room. it was quite small, but neither of them minded upon arrival. rosemary immediately went for the chair, pulling her legs up to her chest and digging around her backpack for something. josh studied her as she pulled out the oh-so-famous notebook, her hands moving rapidly as she flipped through the edge to edge filled pages. she didn't start on a new page, she just drew a line under the words she had written previously and the date and got right to it. oh, what josh would do to read that journal. one of those things would be to ask since at that point it seemed he could ask anything and she wouldn't even be offended. unless it was about her voice of course.
"can i read that?" josh blurted out and sat down on the end of the bed, keeping his eyes on rosemary. she jumped at his voice, her eyebrows furrowed when she looked back at him. seeing he was serious, she raised her eyebrows in surprise. her lips formed a line, her gaze flickering from the book to josh. she tapped her pencil against the page she was writing on and took a deep breath that was almost silent, clicking the pen a few times as she thought. "you don't have to let me, i'm just curious." josh assured her, seeing how much she was struggling with the decision. it made him even more curious as to what was inside that was so important that she couldn't show josh.
finally, she closed the journal and held it out to josh. he was surprised she actually le them, to say the least. he could only imagine what was in there, he almost wanted to deny his own request and keep what knowledge he had. this was like rosemary opening herself up to josh, her thoughts, what she wished she could say, all of it. this was the line between thinking he knows, and knowing. what was on those cluttered pages would change his look on rosemary forever.
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a/n: welp i got carried away and did 5000 words so i shortened it and now you'll get a lot of chapters this week wahey
