What No One Sees

Is This The Process of Healing?

Trigger warning!!
This chapter contains self harm. If you are not comfortable with that, it is advised to skip over this chapter.
Please make sure to take care of yourself, mental and emotion health included!

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You always think that when things are getting better, they'll just keep doing that. You can just do the same things and you'll keep getting better and better until one day, you're all healed.

'But life never works like that, does it?'

Leo sniffled and cursed as his vision blurred again. Another flood of tears poured down his cheeks.

'I should have known better!'

He had to blink several times before he could see enough to continue the act he had started a few minutes earlier. With his shirt crumpled on the floor, the boy had begun to take a small razor to his chest and stomach, digging into the skin until it tore and deep red droplets began to appear, dotting the skin and swelling until they ran down his body in bloody tears.

Leo's body had begun to look as if someone had thrown crimson paint onto him. Even then, he didnt stop. He didnt want to stop. For every cut that he made, for every drop of blood he shed, he felt something lift inside of him. There was a weight being lifted of him, as well as gentle buzzing that had started in the back of his mind. It was almost as if it were to pull him to sleep and he had a feeling that if he laid down and closed his eyes, he would fall right asleep.

But he didn't want to sleep. Sleeping would mean stopping and Leo didn't want to stop. Not yet. No, he had to get as many cuts in as possible before he got caught.

As if on cue, there was a knock on the door. Startled and mid-movement, Leo ended up pushing the blade deeper than he had intended. He let out a low hiss of pain before quickly starting to clean up.

"Leo? Are you in here?" The voice belonged to Jason. He sounded urgent and worried, no doubt concerned about what the Latino would do, or rather, was doing alone.

'Shit! Crap! Damn! Can I run? Maybe I can just stay quiet and he'll-' His thought was broken off as Jason knocked on the door again.

"Leo? Please, I know you're in there. Come out, please!"

Another voice spoke, but it must have been farther off because Leo couldn't make out a word. However, he could assume what was spoken based on Jason's response.

"He's in here, but he won't respond."

Leo froze for a moment wondering how Jason was so positive that he was in here. He couldn't spend much time in thought however and quickly finished cleaning up the area, hiding the blade and pulling on his shirt before wincing as it began to stick to the spots that were still bleeding.

'Thank gods my shirt is black'

Now that all the evidence was gone, Leo took a breath and was about to reply to Jason when suddenly there was more knocking on the door and a new voice spoke up.

"Leo! Leo, open up or, so help me, I will break this door down."

Leo shivered at the rage in Will's voice and he slowly opened the door. He made sure to hunch over a bit so his shirt wouldn't touch his chest and stick. Sheepishly, he met each boys eyes.

"H-hey guys. Heard you were looking for me?"

Before Leo could continue, he was wrapped up in a tight hug. He had to bite his tongue to resist making a sound as his cuts rubbed against Jason.

"What were you doing? I was worried.." Jason trailed off as Leo pulled away and quickly fixed his shirt.

Taking the silence as opportunity, Will had launched into long speech on how Leo wasn't allowed to leave Jason, yadda yadda yadda. Once Will started talking about adding an extra exam, Jason cut in saying how it was unnecessary and that Leo looked fine.

The boy in question didn't say anything. Staring at the ground as the two blondes hashed it out. It only took a few moments before they reached a decision and then parted ways, Jason taking Leo back to his cabin.

"What happened?" He asked as the smaller boy sat down on the couch. A shrug was the only response he got. "Leo, I just don't understand. Why did you run as soon as those nymphs appeared?"

'Yeah Jason, I'm just gonna come right out and say that I've been thinking of cutting all week and with the nymphs to distract you, it was the perfect moment. You'll understand that. Totally'

There was no verbal response.

This seemed to frustrate the other male as he huffed and came around to the other side of the couch, sitting down and facing the other.

"Talk to me."

Leo looked at the blonde and for a moment is seemed like he was going to continue to ignore him, but he didn't.

"Talk about what?" He laughed a bit, "I freaked when those girls appeared. I mean, they're hot babes, the Bad Boy Supreme wasn't ready for all of that."

Something in Jason's chest started to sting, but he shrugged it away. "So you just got scared of the girls?"

Leo nodded, "You can't tell me that's unmanly. Its different when girls don't naturally fawn over you. You wouldn't understand what a lowly peasant like me has to go through to catch the eye of a pretty lady. Put me in the ring with someone like you and it's the wisest choice to back outta the arena."

Jason seemed to contemplate what his friend was saying and, for a moment, he thought he had successfully gotten out of more questions.

"So what did you do?"

He answered quickly, knowing that if he took his time, it would look suspicious. "Naturally, I went back to the cabin, but then I had to go to the bathroom so thats where I was. Then you found me and thats the end of that. You know, you really gotta stop worrying so much. I can take care of myself."

'I've had to do that more times than I'd like to count.'

This seemed to satisfy Jason's questions. Unfortunately, it didn't satisfy his need to feel that the other was safe. As weird as it was to admit, both boys had become a little touch dependant on each other. So when Jason opened his arms for the other to come cuddle, Leo had to agree.

He was happy to cuddle! That wasn't the problem. He was all too happy to cuddle. But he was worried about his shirt which was becoming wet with blood. If he refused, Jason would know something was wrong.

"Um, hang on. I wanna throw on a sweater." Leo scrambled up and quickly moved to the other room before Jason could protest. Grabbing some bandages and a hoodie, he lifted his shirt, quickly bandaging the places that were still bleeding before throwing on the hoodie and coming back to where he had left Jason.

The blonde had a hurt expression. When he spotted Leo, he hid it behind a smile and opened his arms again. The Latino smiled back and gladly snuggled into Jason's chest, feeling as the blonde began to play with his hair. Before long, the two had unintentionally synced their breaths and began to drift off, both content in the moment and neither one expecting what was about to go down when they woke up again.