Friends With Benefits | KSJ x Reader x MYG

The Talk

*** Yoongi's POV***

I just don't know where we are right now. I said.

Y/N was just staring at the bed, not responding.

Hey. Are you listening? I raised my voice a bit but she kept quiet.

Rest up. We can talk later. I said as I stood up and headed out.

I don't understand. Does she not want to talk with me? Is she still mad?

I headed to Namjoon's room. I needed someone to talk with. I peeked since the door was open and I saw the boys on Jin's bed.

Great. Now I am really the bad guy. I thought as I slowly closed the door.

I went to the studio instead. I think I need some "me" time.

I poured myself a drink and sat there. I suddenly had flashbacks of what happened here earlier.

How I let go of Y/N and asked her to get out, how I didn't hesitate to punch Jin and how I heard that they slept with one another.

I slammed my glass on the table, spilling my drink.

Damn it.

Why did I have to be so stupid?

I am mad at myself. I know it now.

I wasn't completely honest with Y/N.

This was not the first time that Claudia made a move on me. The day that Y/N saw us kissing my office studio, I knew that it was not Y/N. The moment that her lips touched mine, I knew that it was Claudia. I didn't stop it, I continued kissing her.

It felt good to be loved by someone wholeheartedly. I felt special.

I know it was unfair for me to judge Y/N but I knew that her heart would never belong to me fully. I always had to share her with Jin.

Yes. I was jealous of Jin. I've seen the way she looks at him. The way they talk, act and even eat together. I could never compete with that.

I would never be the only man that she loves.

I would never be enough.

**********************

***Y/N's POV***

The place was quiet. The rain has stopped.

I opened my eyes and realized that I fell asleep. I could smell whisky, my head started to hurt.

I looked beside me and saw Yoongi sleeping. He must have passed out since he didn't change his clothes.

I quietly stood up and placed a blanket on him. He was sleeping peacefully. God. How could I hurt him?

I crept out of the room and headed to the living area. I curled up on the sofa and started to think.

What do I do now? I am stuck in a loop. A loop of uncertainty.

I heard a door creak.

Jin? I whispered as I looked around.

No. It's just me. Namjoon said.

Hey. Why are you up?

I just needed to get a drink. He said, as he grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

I nodded and started staring blankly into space.

I felt Namjoon sitting beside me.

I gave him a faint smile. Did Jin eat?

He shook his head. Out of the blue, he asked me a question. Did you drink your meds?

I looked at him strangely and nodded.

Good. He wanted to make sure you didn't forget that.

My eyes grew large in shock. Jin asked him to check on me.

Y/N, don't ask me if he is ok. I am sure you know the answer to that.

Tears suddenly started to build in my eyes.

I am sorry. I sobbed.

Hey. Listen, it's not your fault. Their actions are their choices. But your actions are your choice too. Do not regret them but deal with them face on. Namjoon calmly said.

I buried my face on the pillow, sobbing like shit.

Hey. Let me tell you something about this group. He said, as he tried to help me sit up. He held my hands and started to tell me about the group.

I have known them for over 9 - 10 years. We've been through alot. Good times and bad. Honestly, we've got it all. Fame. Fortune. Family. But something that not all of us have are relationships. Not just romantic relationships but deep relationships. You can only possibly count in one hand how many real relationships we've got.

When you came into our lives, honestly, you sort of set the bar on what we want. Namjoon laughed.

I looked at him questionably.

Hey. Seriously, we all had a crush on you at one point or another. I remember when you first came here, Jungkook was head over heels. Do you remember how he used to hop around you when you're in the kitchen?

I laughed. He was pretty cute that time. Namjoon chuckled.

How bout you, Joonie? When did you have a crush on me? I teased.

Namjoon turned red.

If you really want to know, it was the time I got sick. Even though I caused everyone to get sick, You didn't leave me.

That's when I started to sort of know what I want in life, what I want in a relationship, well, if I get to have a relationship.

I smiled.

Here's the thing Y/N. It's not your fault that you fell in love with both of them. But, again, this is just my opinion, you guys need space right now. It's too heated. You guys are hurt. And it hurts us too to see you all like that.

My advice, stop using your brain but start using your heart.

Namjoon gave me a big hug then he stood up and headed back to his room.

He was right. I kept of using my brain. I think of how they would feel and all that. I never took into consideration how I felt about them.

I thought I needed to talk with Yoongi or Jin to get clarity but it turns out, I needed to talk with myself and my heart.