Gwendalynn: The Girl With Cancer

Gwendalynn | 36

When we went on a trip together...

DECEMBER - 2012

"Christmas break!" Ryan shouted, lifting his arms up. "Freedom! For two weeks!"

I laughed. "Put your arms down."

Ryan did so and turned to me. "When does your flight leave?"

"Tomorrow morning."

"Excited to go on a trip with Gweeeeeen?" he teased, poking my side.

I shook my head. "Her parents and my parents will be there."

"So? You're going to New York, Kyle. You should have plenty of privacy," he winked.

I shook my head, biting the inside of my cheek. "It's not like that with Gwen and you know that."

"I was just testing you," he explained. "I like Gwen. She's a cool girl. I know she'd never let you do that to her."

I kept silent as we walked down the halls with our bags slung over our shoulders.

"But, if she did want to," he went on, "would you?"

I thought for a moment. Gwen would be my first and I knew for a fact it'd be the same way for her, but we were only sixteen. Well, I was seventeen, she was sixteen. The thing was, I couldn't imagine doing anything sexual with Gwen apart from making out, and we didn't even do that much.

"No."

"Like, you don't have any intention? Not even a little bit?"

I shrugged. "I don't-" I paused. "I don't know. I never thought about it. See, the thing with Gwen is you don't need sex to still... like being in the relationship, to need to stay in it. I already know I want to stay in it. I already know I like being in the relationship. It's just her." I smiled to myself.

"Alright, alright, I get it. I don't need to hear this sappy love shit."

I laughed. "Then why are you asking?"

"I was expecting more of a 'at some point she'll want to do it but I'll wait for now' or 'I'm too wimp to do it,' you know?"

"Well... both of those are some reasons, but the main one is just that I'm cool being a virgin for now."

He nodded. "You know, girls here would find that pretty hot."

"You're starting to sound like Noah."

"I'm serious, Kyle."

"It'd be embarrassing for me though."

"No it wouldn't."

I gave him a flat look. "Okay, you go and tell everyone you're a virgin in attempt to get a girl."

"I don't need a girl. I got Leia."

"Oh yeah. How's that workin' out for you?"

"It's not bad. She's cool."

"Cool enough to wait for when she's ready?"

"I don't think we'll last long enough, but I wouldn't force her to do anything she wouldn't want to."

I nodded, approaching my car. "I'll see you after Christmas break, man."

"Later."

I got into my car and turned up the heat as soon as the key was jammed into the ignition. I drove home with slight difficulty, the icy roads becoming more prominent than the previous days driving home from school.