The Ghosts Of Her Past (A Completed, Steamy Romantic Mystery)

Part Forty One

Dear Diary,

I haven't updated for quite some time, I've been brought to Mexico after Mr. Bertinelli found us in Alaska.  Lance was taken away, and I fear for his safety.  I was brought to a bedroom where I've been for a few days now.  I'm fed well, and Mr. Bertinelli is still very angry about Gregory.  I have told him over and over again that I meant no harm. I loved Gregory and never would have done anything to cause him harm. 

Last night he made me join him for dinner.  He is much older than I imagined, and his health seems to be deteriorating rapidly.  I have no idea if I'll be forced to give birth in this place, but I'm scared.  I want to keep my baby, but it seems the old man has other plans. 

Blaine skipped over a few pages.  "This moves quickly, it doesn't look like she updated it very often." He said.

"What's next?" I asked, and he read another passage saying Mr. Bertinelli has been changing toward her, and she has hopes to be set free soon.  He moved on to the next one.

Dear Diary,

I am getting very worried, I haven't been set free yet.  It's getting close to my due date, and I'm scared to give birth here in this compound.  It's been a few months now, but I have freedoms inside this compound.  Mr. Bertinelli is negotiating with men he said may do us harm.  He set Lance free just to see what happens. If he finds danger, I may very well be stuck here.  I worry for Lance, his freedom is just a test of fate.  This means if he survives, I'll have my freedom. 

All my assets have been returned, but each day I wake up hoping it's the day I can leave.  My thoughts take me to other places once I have been released.  One thing I know for sure, I will not return to New York.  I cannot live in that society and see the shame on my family's faces. 

Blaine paused at the end of that entry.   "What is she talking about?  There would have been no shame from us, we just wanted her home and safe." He said when he looked up to me. 

I shrugged.  "Maybe it's not you, but the people associated with your family?"

He just looked at me.  "Those people don't matter, and I would have done everything to make sure they both knew how much they were loved."

I sighed.  "Those women in the ladies room that day, they made reference to me.  They said I must have been Cassidy's friend because I didn't meet your standards. Maybe she didn't want to face the judgment of those people."

He sat back and looked down at the diary.  "Why would she think I would feel ashamed?"

I know the answer, but I can't say it to him.  He's too conservative and lives his life as expected.  He is dedicated to that company, and Cassidy probably felt like they all were disappointed in her for being a single mom.  Hell, I already feel that way, and he doesn't even know my secret.

"Maybe we'll learn more in the diary," I answered.  I'm starting to feel uncomfortable because this is family business. 

"I may actually head upstairs and give you some privacy.  This really isn't my business, and I'm exhausted.  Do you mind if I head upstairs?" I asked.

He looked over at me.  "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. Today was a little overwhelming, and I'm exhausted," I said as I stood, and he set the diary down and stood with me. 

"You really need to tell me if this gets to be too much.  I would understand." He said. 

"I really am okay, I'll see you in the morning." I turned and walked away.

"Cora?" He said my name, so I turned around. 

"Yes?"

"Thanks for being there and not pressuring me to talk about it."

I gave him a smile.  "Whenever you're ready, I'm here."

"Thank you." He said.

"Anytime, Blaine."

I thought I would have no problem sleeping, but Blaine and the baby weigh heavily on my mind. 

He most likely isn't reading something that will give him peace.  I could see by her last entry, she made decisions based on her family, and it's that last thing they need to hear.  I ran my hand over my flat belly and rested it over my baby. 

I wonder if it's a boy or a girl?  Will it have Gray's dark hair or my blond hair?  What are the chances it will have my green eyes? 

I finally drifted off to sleep, only to wake up a few hours later.  My phone says it's 1 am. I was careful not to get up too fast and slowly made my way downstairs for a drink. It was dark, so I presume Blaine went to bed.  The water was cold and relieved my thirst, but as soon as I stepped out of the kitchen, I heard Blaine's voice.

"Did you know?"

"Blaine?" I looked around, but a lamp flipped on, and I saw him sitting in the corner with a drink of whiskey in his hand.

"Did you know?  Is that why you went to bed, you knew it was all my fault?" He asked.

I stepped closer.  "What did she write?" I asked.

"That she felt like a failure because of me, that I would judge her because of the situation?" He leaned forward on his elbows and looked up at me. 

"You already knew she was pregnant when she left.  What makes you think its your judgement that kept her away?" I took another step closer and he stood.

He tossed the diary and it landed at my feet.  "It's all in there if you want to read it, I'm sure you'll understand her thoughts." He sounds defeated.

"I felt like it might go in that direction." I said.