Wrong lies -M.R, D.M, T.N

37-Taking a break

"Catch myself thinking about you more than I should."

The words flew out of my mouth. Some of me didn't expect them, but it's for the better. I gave him everything I had, and he still didn't trust me. This is all hard for me, forgiven him after everything he did. Do I love him? Yes, I fucking do. But he needs to work on himself before being in my life like this. I can't have a boyfriend who can't even see me with another boy and thinks I'm cheating on him. What's next? Im sleeping with Draco behind his back? We need a break.

"Please, dont say that. I need you," he stands up, staring at me with sad eyes, and I swallow the tears.

"I'm not leaving Mattheo, I love you guys, and I won't ever fucking leave. But we need a break until you have worked on your trust. Because I would never, ever fucking cheat on you." He nods slowly and grabs my hand. I could take a step back, but I let him.

"I lo-"

"No, dont say that now. We will make this work one day, and then you can tell me how you feel. But it's not fair that you say it now. It's not fair to any of us," he looks down. I feel my heart breaking, knowing he was going to say it. A part of me thinks he means it. I know he cares about me, and he is truly amazing. But this behaviour isn't how you treat someone you truly love. He needs to understand that.

"If it doesn't work?" He asks, staring at me.

"It's not up to me now. I'm here, working on myself. We can try again when you feel you have found your trust and can fully trust me around others." He nods slowly.

"I want that. Can you stay?" I sigh; staying with him right now after a break feels weird. I'm trying to be strong before him but falling apart. I love this guy. No part of me doesn't. But I need to be selfish in this, for once.

"I can't. I need to be alone." He frowns.

"You have been away for a whole summer. At least tell me about Le-" I stare at him, shaking my head before walking towards the door.

"Daisy, wait. I didn't mean it like that." I look back at him, wiping away a tear.

"You think this is healthy?" I point between us.

"I dont, and it's my fault." I sigh deeply, closing my eyes.

"I'll see you in class" I open the door, hearing his voice behind me.

"Daisy, please,"

********

I didn't think it would hurt this much. Maybe it's because I dont know how it will end. Do I want us to get back together? Yes, now, please. Do I think he will work on himself? I dont know. Trust is something you can't buy from another person, which fucking sucks.

"Hey..." I look up and see Draco standing there. In the garden. I wipe away my tears before forcing a smile.

"Hey," he sits down beside me.

"You dont have to act strong in front of me. It's okay to be sad," I chuckle a little, feeling my tears near again.

"I feel so fucking stupid," I drop my head to my hands, feeling my tears come. Draco sits there, quiet for a while.

"I.uh," I feel him jumping closer before he pulls me into a side hug. It's awkward initially, but then I lean towards him, crying, and he relaxes.

"Dont feel stupid. It's okay. You did what's right, Dais." He plays with my hair, and I try to calm down.

"Pansy saw us. She manipulated Mattheo into thinking I cheated on him. What did I fucking do to her? I did nothing; she bullied me, threatened me, and ruined my life. What did I do wrong?" I look up at him with blurry eyes, but he looks sad and furious.