My Alpha, My Love

Chapter 17 Wow

Jason P.O.V

     I sighed as Kearstin got up as soon as I was parked. I took off my helmet, stood up and grabbed the basket. I dropped it off in the kitchen and made my way to the office where something was waiting for me. My beta didn't want to tell me over the mind link, he told me that I needed to see this for myself.

     I walked in and began speaking, "Someone better be dying because I was about to...." I trailed off as I saw Amanda facing me with a hand on her stomach. There was a small bump and I looked from her face to her hand and finally understood. I had gotten Amanda pregnant before she left. This is what her threat meant. She knew she was pregnant and she was just waiting until she was showing to return. By now she looked like she was about 4 weeks along.

     I said the first thing that came to my mind, "There is no way this baby is mine." I knew I sounded like one of those guys on Jerry spring or something denying their child but this can't be happening. Not now. Not right after Kearstin was giving me a chance.

     "I told you that you were going to regret your decision. I'm pregnant with your pup. We will see if your precious little mate will want you now. We will see how the pack feels about the fact that you rejected the female pregnant with your pup."

     "What do you want Amanda?" There had to be some ulterior motive. Something she wanted in return for her silence.

     "I just want my child to grow up in the same pack that I did. I want back into the pack. Either you let me back in, or I let your precious little mate know that you got me pregnant." There it was. She wanted back in the pack for her silence about the pregnancy. She knew exactly what that would do. Kearstin would definitely leave me if she knew that I had gotten another she wolf pregnant. And I couldn't even blame her. I couldn't let her find out about this. It would break my wolfs heart and, if I was being honest, my heart too.

     I knew she was manipulating me but there was nothing I could do about it. "Fine you can stay, but you will be treated just like any other pack member. You will be assigned a pack job and you will not get your own house. You will get a pack room and you will never go near Kearstin. If I find you near her you will spend the rest of your pregnancy in the dungeons and when our child is born, I will kill you."

     She smiled walking up to me. I held myself stiff as she stood on the tips of her toes to whisper in my ear, "I'm carrying your child. I would remember that if I were you."

     I heard the threat in her tone as she walked out of the room. I knew she had me. She had my fucking balls in a vice grip and if I made one wrong move she would tear them off. I couldn't let her hurt my pup and her threat was very clear, try to push her around and she would end my pups life before it ever saw the light of day. The right amount of wolfs bane and she would miscarry while still living. I became angry at her and myself as I grabbed a vase and shattered it between my hands. I was so fucked. It is only a matter of time before Kearstin found out, and I would have to tell her.

Kearstin P.O.V

     A few hours later I ventured out of my room and into the kitchen for a snack. As I walked in I was hit with a familiar scent and I was surprised at what I saw. In front of me was the long legged blonde that once claimed my mate as her own. Not only that, but the only thing she was wearing was a mans shirt that smelt like Jason.

     "What the hell are you doing here and why are you wearing my mates shirt?"

     She spun around quickly not having realized that I had walked in. Her hand immediately rested on her stomach in surprise and my eyes widened at the bump she was sporting under my mates shirt that was baggy on her.

     She sent a large fake smile at me and said, "Why don't you ask Jason? I'm sure he will spin an interesting story about our child. You were just a play thing for while, but now I'm back. You can stop trying to make Jason love you now. He only has and only will ever love one person and that is me."

     I watched as she walked in the same direction as Jason's bed room. I was frozen in place for a moment with thoughts turning threw my head. Jason had gotten her pregnant? This whole time he had been playing with me while he got Amanda pregnant. He was lying to me. This was the real reason he hadn't marked me yet. He was still with Amanda and she was pregnant with his child. This cant be right. There has to be some explanation. I snapped out of my thoughts as I made my way to Jason's bedroom. It was after midnight so he should be in there by now. I quickly walked into his room and I was confronted by the sight of him and Amanda lip locking while he was in nothing but a towel with his hair dripping wet.

     I cleared my throat and Jason jumped away from Amanda looking really guilty, "Kearstin, I was just coming to see you."

     "Oh that much was clear as you lip locked with Amanda. Took a shower to get her scent off of you but just needed one last kiss to get threw your time with me huh?"

           He frowned at me, "What? No Kearstin listen...."

     "I don't want to listen anymore! I just want the truth, which you obviously cant give me! Amanda has told me the truth! She may have done it out of pure hate but at least someone had the balls to tell me the truth!" I felt my wolf trying to take control I was so angry.

     Jason walked over and touch my arm lightly trying to calm me, "Don't fucking touch me!"

     He backed away with his hands up in surrender, "Kearstin calm down."

     "DON'T FUCKING TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!" I roared. With this I ran past a surprised Jason and Amanda and I shifted as I flew off the balcony towards the ground. I looked back at the balcony at a surprised Amanda and Jason before turning and running off.

     I ran and ran until I collapsed in my wolf form crying. This pain was so much for my wolf that without my permission I changed back into my human form and I was unable to reach my wolf. Where she use to be was just this big empty cold space. I started sobbing harder. I lost my wolf. She is gone. I'm nothing without her. Eventually as it happens in everyone who loses their wolf I was going to die. I wasn't sad because after all of this pain I would welcome death. Your wolf makes up half of you and you cant live forever with only half of your body working. In rare cases someone has survived this but they are never the same as before they lost their wolf. This pain was just too unbearable. To go from knowing the freedom of having a wolf and shifting whenever you want but mostly the constant companionship. The knowing that no matter what you are not alone. I hate him, And I hate myself because I don't hate him.