𝐆𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐒𝐤𝐢𝐞𝐬┊✓

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— leannán —
(n) "lover," "darling," "sweetheart"
origin ; irish

Things were slowly going back to normal, if that's even what we were. We were back to fooling around, laughing, and just being us. After that episode I had of completely blanking out and losing control of who I was, we were all walking on eggshells - even Phoenix. They all treated me as if I was delicate glass, breakable at any moment. Sadly what I hid inside was the fact that I was already broken, I was literally on a road to self destruction. I kept breaking myself over and over again. But it seemed with the help of my friends, they would slowly piece me back together and heal my scarred bones.

Though I was myself around Pyper, Marl, Judah, Blake and Talon, anytime I was around Phoenix, I'd become awfully quiet and unsure about myself. My mind would race with questions, what ifs, I became self conscious, I was being tortured with my crippling anxiety. He did in a way break down every wall I built for myself. He burned down my walls one by one. He ripped my self confidence from me, he ruined me.

My eyes began to tears up as I thought back to all the things exchanged between us in his car that day. And it was fucking painful to even think back to it in the slightest. I think the only reason I was able to recover from it was because Marlowe came to talk to me. It was day after I had my episode, I was sitting up against my headboard all alone in my room.

— f l a s h b a c k —

"Adrianna," Marlowe all but barged into my room with his eyebrows furrowed.

"Marl, hey," I whisper hoarsely. I'd been crying all of the night before.

"We need to talk, you and I."

I closed my notebook and gave him my full attention as he strode over to my bed and took a seat at the foot side. And then all was silent.

"Okay, what the hell happened yesterday my dear?" He asked, exploding almost, as if he'd been dying to ask, "You've been ignoring every one of us, and after that episode yesterday, I can't let you isolate yourself."

"I don't know Marl," I murmur.

"Start where you feel is right," he pushed lightly in a genuine way.

"We were perfect, things between us were going pretty genuine. Actually the past few weeks, since my father's funeral, things have been sincere with us. And then yesterday, two days ago, we were in his room, just together, and everything felt so surreal but perfect at the same time. And then he left for the washroom and his phone went off with a text from none other than Infinity. That's when I left and went for a run.

"Then yesterday, he came to my room and just said we're going out. He didn't exactly give me a way to argue either. It was when we came back that things went off between us. He realised I was acting all distant because of that text from Infinity. But I mean, how was I supposed to act? What was I supposed to think, Marl? Her text seemed like they were together!

"And then," I choked, "And then he started saying some things," I felt tears slide down my cheeks.

"What did Phoenix say to you, Adrianna," Marlowe all but demanded with a raised eyebrow.