Helpless when she smiles [Sam Drake x plusSize!Reader]

Chapter 11

What if he doesn't want to have sex with you?

You felt how your anxiety started to rise on your chest when you started to think what happened on the couch before the movie. He clearly was hard, you were sure of it. Why didn't he try to have sex with you?

Was it because he didn't find you sexy or attractive enough to want to have sex with you? But he was hard, why he would be hard if that was the case? You tried your hardest to push all those negative thoughts away and think it clearer, but you couldn't help it when your insecurity took over - again.

You turned away from Sam's armpit and turned your back to him, trying to fall asleep. But you couldn't. You felt how that crushing pain in your chest raised and like something was stuck on your throat, making you feel like you couldn't breathe, while your thoughts were racing inside your head like a fastened movie. You glanced over your shoulder to make sure Sam was asleep before you got up from the bed and headed to the living room.

You went to your emergency pack of cigarettes to take a couple from there, you took your lighter and keys, and went to your door. You took your jacket and keys and quietly opened the door, making sure it won't make any noise to not to wake up Sam, as you sneaked out to smoke. You needed to calm yourself somehow.

Sam woke up when he felt that you weren't in his armpit when he felt that the warmth on his side was gone. He opened his eyes and waited so they get used to the darkness what was flying around him. Then he heard you sigh.

He sat up and saw you sitting on the other side of the bed, your knees on your chest and your head between them.

"[Y/N]?" He whispered and you spooked, raising your head to see that he was awake.

"What's wrong?" He moved closer to you on the mattress, placing his hand on your shoulder, rubbing it with his thumb. You shook your head and took a deep breath.

"Tell me."

"I - I just." You tried to think what excuse you could use. You surely weren't going to tell him what was really wrong, you couldn't tell him that you felt bad because he didn't try to have sex with you. It sounded so ridiculous, but the thought of the reason was haunting your mind.

But you had become too comfortable around him, his present made miracles to you, so you opened your mouth, while the words slipped from your lips:

"You don't wanna have sex with me do you?"

If there was any sleepiness in Sam's eyes they were all gone now. He was stunned. Where had you got that idea?

"What?" He needed to make sure he just heard you right.

"Forget it." You leaned your head back on your knees and sighed again.

"Wait, where did you get that idea?" Sam moved even closer to you, and took your hand, smoothing the top of it with his thumb.

"On the couch. You didn't try anything. Is it because you think I'm not attractive?"

Sam chuckled.

"If I didn't find you attractive do you think that I would have become hard in the first place? Damn [Y/N], I only need to glance at you and I'm already hard."

You raised your head and saw a smirk on his face. Was he serious? Was he - was he trying to tell you that he was hard now?

"I didn't make a move because I knew you aren't ready. I want you to feel totally comfortable before we took the next step."

He moved a hair strap away from your face behind your ear and caressed your cheek.

"We agreed we take it slow." He whispered and gave you a soft smile.

You shook your head and put your hand in front of your eyes. Oh god, this was so embarrassing. You knew it was ridiculous, but somehow it bothered you anyway. And now the whole situation was so awkward.

Sam took a hold on your ankles and pulled, so you slipped on your back against the mattress, a small gasp escaped from your lips while Sam crawled to lay on top of you, pushing his groin against yours. And you were right - he was hard.

"You still doubt that I don't wanna have sex with you?" He whispered while he leaned down and nuzzled his nose slowly against yours, while he rocked his hips against you, and you felt his hard cock touching you through your clothes. You left a small, quiet moan from your lips, as your breathing started to get heavier and you felt how the warmth spread between your legs all over your body.

You shook your head as an answer, there was no doubt about what he wanted to do.

"Good, and don't you ever doubt that again, because I could do it right here and now." He pushed his hard cock harder against you, making you left another moan from your lips - this time it was loud - and he leaned down to kiss you eagerly to muffle your moan, or he'll be not able to control himself.

That moan was a music to his ear, now the whole situation was even harder for him. He wanted to hear you moan under him, he wanted to hear how much noise you would have when he makes love to you, especially when you just had given him a good presentation what was about to come.

"But like I said, I want you to feel totally comfortable. So now, we just sleep, okay?" He said while your lips separated finally.

You nodded and swallowed the lump away from your throat, the taste of his lips still lingering on yours.

Sam rolled from the top of you to lay on his side next to you while he smoothed your hair, with a stupid smirk on his face. He clearly enjoyed the whole situation. You took a quick glance down at his boxer shorts before you turned your eyes to his face.

There was that stupid cocky smirk stuck on his face and you couldn't help but smile back.

"Does that not bother you?" You asked.

"Does what bothering me?" He raised his brows. He clearly was teasing you, he knew exactly what you were referring. You hated that, you tilted your head and looked at him with your "are you serious"-face.

"You know." You said while nodded your head down.

"No. But if it bothers you I can deal that away so it won't bother you anymore." He bit his lower lip and lifted his eyebrows, while your eyes widened, your ears were burning and you hit Sam in his chest and he chuckled

"Samuel!" You screamed and hid your face in your palms. You felt like you were a teenager again and sex was all new and funny thing to you. It wasn't the case, you have had sex before, but it was a long time ago.

Sam laughed and grabbed you against his chest and kissed your forehead.

"Just kidding. Now, let's sleep, and wake me up if you feel bad again, okay?" You nodded against him and sighed, while taking your hands away front of your face, only to wrap the other one around him.

You felt stupid about feeling and thinking the way you did. Why it even bothered you that he didn't try anything? You had dated over a month, and this was the first time you two even spend a night together.

He had an amazing impact on you. His present truly made you feel calm and relaxed. And now when you were laying in his arms, you couldn't imagine spending your nights anywhere else, than next to him.