Helpless when she smiles [Sam Drake x plusSize!Reader]

Chapter 26

Hot steam from your cup of tea raised up from your mug, as you looked down in your hands while you played with your fingers. Sam sat opposite side of the table, looking at you, with a relief in his heart that he managed to stop you to make an abortion.

You were ashamed of what you almost did. But you didn't knew what else you should have done.

"I'm sorry." You whispered while looking down at your fidgeting hands. You couldn't raise your gaze, you didn't deserve to look at him.

"It's okay. But we need to talk to each others when we have fears or doubts." Sam told you.

"I know. I'm just so used to be alone and made decisions all by myself. I'm not used to that there's someone else and that some things might affect they too." You said and took a sip from your tea, feeling how the hot water burned your throat a little, making you to grin.

"But you're not alone anymore." Sam told you, while reached over the table to take your hand when you had put them back down on the table, and he started rubbing your knuckles with his thumb.

You finally raised your gaze to him. Yes, you weren't alone anymore, but after spending so many years alone, it was hard to trust someone completely just after four months - if you even can ever trust someone completely. But there was much more what you and Sam had to learn about each others, even you knew about your pasts, there was always something new to learn every single day.

You sighed and frowned. "This is big."

"I know, and it's scary. But we can do this, I know we can." Sam smiled to you.

"What if you choose you don't want this? And I end up alone? I can't do this alone." You said while looking down your tea again. Sam got up and moved his chair next to you, while cupping your cheek and turned you to face him again.

It was better when you looked into his eyes, you could see that he truly meant what he was saying - that was one thing he had learned about you, you believed better what you saw, not what you heard.

"I would never leave you alone. I was an orphan, our father left me and Nathan to orphanage. I would never abandon my child. I won't end up to be like him." He caressed your cheek and you looked into his eyes. Sadness was back in those.

You knew that his father was one of his weak points. He had told you what kind of father they had, and how he always was afraid that he will end up like him. Even you didn't knew his father personally, you knew that Sam would never be like his father. Sam was kind and sweet, he has a big and a good heart, and he always had take care of his little brother and others, no matter what happens to him.

Sure he had lied to his brother and got him into danger, and almost ruined his marriage, but he did that only so they can finish their mother's legacy, the one thing Sam ever cared about since he was just a kid. But Sam and Nathan were all good now, reunited after 15 years and probably being closer than ever.

But yet, you did not condemn him because of his past, about his mistakes and sins what he did before your two's destiny's entwined. You needed to learn and see what kind of man he was today, at this very moment and what he's about to do with his future.

He has been openly to you about his past when he didn't care and he fucked every women he just could. And he had proven to you not only by his words but his actions too, that he no longer need to do that, because you had filled the hole in his heart what he was seeking from all those women's bed.

You squeezed Sam's hand. He had proven himself as an trustful man, as an good man, and all of your fears and doubts were your own demons, yourself poisoning your mind, and no-one else. And only you could face them and defeat them.

Sam stood up, still holding your hand, gesturing you to follow him. You took your tea cup and let him lead you to the couch. Sam sat down and pulled you after him to sat on his armpit. You carefully sat down, without spilling your hot tea on neither on you.

"So, I guess first we need to think where we are going to live." Sam said while leaned back. You both knew that neither of your's apartment was not big enough to the three of you. You needed to look for a bigger apartment.

"I can't afford anything. I had no job, and nobody would even hire me when I'm pregnant." You said sadly before you took another sip from your tea. Sam nodded and looked up to the ceiling, while smoothing your arm with his hand which was around you.

"Well, I think I can sell my apartment, and maybe me and Sully can look couple extra jobs so I can had the money to buy a house."

You almost spilled your tea from your mouth, making you only to swallow it wrong and almost choke on it. You leaned forward to but your mug to the table, while coughing badly, which only reminded you that this wasn't the first time you almost choked on your drink on this very same couch - and because of Sam.

"Wow, that sounded bad" Sam said and gently patted your back, while you coughed.

When you got it all out, you turned to Sam.

"A house?" Sam looked little confused, yeah, a house, he was the man and it was his right and duty to buy you a house.

"I won't let you do that." You shook your head. You didn't want to be dependent on him or his money, or house, or anything.

"Well we can't live here and we can't live at my place neither, and I thought the house would be much better choice than a small apartment. He caressed your shoulder while you frown.

"We have to find another solution." You sighed and leaned back on his armpit. You had so much to talk about and so much to figure out what you two were gonna do. Silence slowly filled the air.

"I want it to be a girl." Sam broke the silence and you raised your head, to see that Sam was staring the ceiling. You moved a little and leaned your cheek on his shoulder, so you could see his face.

"Is it a maybe a little too early to think that?"

Sam shrugged his shoulders a little: "Maybe."

"But I still want it to be a girl. I want her to be like you. Beautiful, sweet, gentle, who has kind heart. My little princess." Sam smiled and looked down your stomach and put his hand on it, gently rubbing it with his thumb. You smiled and placed your hand on top of his, entwining your fingers with him to make him stub for rubbing.

"I want him to be a boy." You told him after a short silence.

"Really?" Sam asked and you raised your gaze to meet his eyes.

"I want a sweet little boy, with hazel eyes, with a warmest and biggest heart in the world. Who loves unconditionally and purely."

On Sam's lips there raised a small smile, before he leaned down to kiss you gently. When you felt his soft lips on yours, you thought that maybe everything will turn out fine. Maybe you two could make it work, maybe you spend for the rest of your lives together.

"I love you [Y/N]." Sam nuzzled his nose against yours, as you closed your eyes and sighed deeply.

"I love you too."