Chapter Thirty-Eight

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Hearing the sound of the door opening and the sound of the very familiar comforting heart beat entering the loft, I pushed my hand out from the duvet in a weak effort of urging him to come closer. "Come here," I ordered with a gentle groan and Derek did as told walking over and sitting on the edge of the bed.

His brows were furrowed as if expecting bad news, "what?"

I wasn't able to give a verbal response, it was far too cold and my teeth were practically chattering together. Instead, I managed to find his hand tugging on it and forcing him down onto the bed and closer to myself. Of course he had the strength and complete ability to move away, but he didn't. He never would. I used him like a duvet as I wrapped his arm around me, snuggling into the heat his body gave off. "That's better," I managed to mutter out closing my eyes again.

A deep chuckle fell from his chest as he shifted his weight presumably to get more comfortable, "cold again?"

"Yes."

His fingertips slowly began to trace circles down my skin and further down my waist towards my legs. I already knew what he was doing before he spoke, "you know I have a better way of warming us up," he mused his lips gracing the edge of my ear. I quickly twisted around to face him our noses basically touching.

"You're a perverted man, Derek Hale," a smirk formed on his face as his hand snaked around my back.

"Is that a yes?"

"You're perverted," I repeated and he chuckled again, and I couldn't help the joy which spread through my own mind as the smile claimed my face.

"Just a little bit," he trailed off already moving in for kisses.

"A little bit," I mocked back.

That was so long ago now.

Now everything felt so empty. There was a void. A large one, a cold one which felt like ice was creeping over my body. Was this what death felt like? My mind couldn't stop going back to Derek because despite it being barely twelve hours I missed him, but when I thought about him I remembered what he'd done and it only brought anger.

Grabbing onto the pawn, I pushed it over to a different square trying to ignore the sound of my phone ringing. It was probably Scott or Stiles finding something out about the supernatural world. I didn't want to be dealing with that right now. I couldn't deal with that right now. I didn't want to deal with that right now.

"Hey kid," a voice called out, and I glanced up to the door to see Noah. His eyes were filled with concern and sorrow and yet I couldn't help it. "You doin' okay?"

Humming, I gave a gentle nod. I'd tried to hide the break-up but the moment he'd asked the first 'you okay' I'd completely broken down. There was no warning, no hope of hiding it, just complete and utter misery.

I kept trying to figure out why he'd done it. He'd always been there for me: when the alpha attacked, every time he got injured and I'd felt it he'd come to check on me, he'd let me use him as a walking heat source, he'd been there for the first full moon, he'd done everything he could to keep me alive. So why didn't he want me to know that he was alive? Why did he choose to tell Jennifer Blake first?

Was it me? Had I done something wrong?

"Alright, just... call me if you need me," Noah said and I nodded again feeling the tears burning at my eyes as he stepped away. Why was I so pathetic? Why did this keep happening to me? All I seemed to be able to do was cry.

"Grace," bolting to my feet, I turned around to face the window where Derek was stood. I couldn't even say anything. I thought I'd told him to stay away and yet there he was stood. I hadn't even heard him come in, how had I not heard it? Glancing at his outfit and his body, I returned my eyes to his face. There was something fundamentally wrong with all of it. "You need to tell me what I need to do to fix this," he pleaded.

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