Mind of Steel | Part two | L.N.

LXXXI

After Leah and Petra got back from Cassidy's that day. Lando immediately tried to get Leah to talk to him about what was bothering her, buts he insisted that it was nothing and it was going to wait until after the race this weekend when Max and Petra would return home. He agreed only because he knew that she would talk to him if they weren't there. It also worried him. Since Petra also wouldn't tell him what had happened. Petra didn't give him anything. When he asked Petra simply said to ask Leah and she will talk to him when she wants to. Lando was annoyed but understood.

Over the last few days they've done things like normal, the only thing is that Leah hasn't been as touchy with him. She has barely been able to look him in the eyes. Lando noticed that immediately. She would hug him from behind, which she didn't do before, she would hold his hand like normal. Kiss him in public, but in the house, she ignored him a little bit and he didn't understand why. He has been patiently waiting as his heart slowly began to rip into itself trying to figure out how to make her happy again. Lando struggled with his mental health as well, but being with Leah makes him feel so much better. When she is around, she knows just how to bring him back to the light. Times like this is when he really has to show some strength to keep both their heads above the water. if he gave up, he felt like they would drown. Fall into each other's darknesses and it would be too hard to get back out. Lando just wanted to be happy, but you can't be happy without some struggle. His parents always told him that.

"Are you ready?" Isabella asked as Leah zipped up her fireproofs.

"Yeah," Leah muttered as she grabbed her helmet and walked out onto the track. Someone came up behind her and grabbed her upper arm.

"Your head isn't in this, what's wrong?" Max asked. Leah just shook her head as she made sure she had both gloves, balaclava, and helmet as she walked toward her car in P1.

"I'm all good, you are the one that needs to focus," Leah mentioned as she pointed at him. No smile on her face.

"Alright, but after this, you are going to tell me what's wrong," Max urged as she walked over to his car putting his gear on. Leah squatted next to her car and leaned her forehead on her arms for a moment as she caught her breath.

"Leah?" Lando asked as he put a hand on her lower back. She had her arms resting on the side of her car, her forehead pressed against them. She leaned back and looked up at him. "Love, are you okay?"

"I'm okay, you should probably get to your car though, I need to get my gear on anyway," Leah sighed as she pushed herself up. She didn't know how to tell him. She's been dreading it ever since she talked with Petra and Cassidy. Leah didn't want to lose Lando. He was the only good thing in her life right now. She didn't want to let him go, but after everything she's put him through and everything she was going to go through, she didn't want to hurt him any more than she already has. She didn't want to divorce him either, she didn't even want to think about it. But she knew from the moment her doctor told her, this was going to break them. Leah wasn't enough.

"Okay, I just wanted to make sure you were feeling alright, you've really been worrying me," Lando reasoned. Leah smiled and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

"I don't mean to worry you, I'm sorry, I'm just," She sighed, "I guess I'm just a little stressed."

"You promise that tomorrow you are going to talk to me, that's still going to happen right?" He asked as he smiled down at her. He attempted to make it a little joke. Leah immediately looked away from him at the other cars.

"Yeah, but you really should get back to your car now, Lan, be safe," She told him.

"I love you," He kissed her forehead as he walked away from her. He noticed that she didn't say it back and an ache formed in his chest. She always said it back. Leah had to bite her tongue for a moment.