Edge Of Destruction

Chapter 43

Arianna's POV

Two days have passed since the insurgents have won the war, the royals fell to their knees and I lost the person I was never able to call me own. The days have happen in a black and white blur, I remain cooped up in my room, breaking apart.

From what I've heard moments after Caleb had passed on to the next life, the gong rung signalling the victory. Caleb would have loved to hear that. Vaguely remembering passing out from the trauma, I woke up the next day in my room - in the castle. The insurgents are preparing executions for all royal associates and my parents.

But I don't care anymore. I'm drained. Completely shattered. Why am I still crying over spilled milk? I miss Caleb so much. Every waking moment is consumed by his memory. I never thought that we would have a last kiss. I feel an ache in my heart that makes me want to shrivel away into the foundations of the Earth. No amount of pain can top what I'm feeling. I told him everything, confiding in him, told him my past thinking my future was him.

I'm trying to forget him but Caleb is so unforgettable.

"Princess, the insurgents have called your assistance," a man at the door says.
"No, can't you see I'm broken. He's dead, don't you know he is dead. I am dead," I shriek violently.
"Please your highness, it's about Caleb Hart," he meekly says.
"Caleb..." the name sounds so ghostly on my lips.

Panting hard I sprint down the stairs, wiping the tears from my face. I barge into the conference room,
"Caleb," I shout.
"Your majesty, Caleb isn't here. His death hit us all hard," I vaguely remember this man as a friend of Caleb's.
"I loved him. His death slaughtered me. I was in love with him. He was my heart and soul. Why wasn't it in the stars for us? I yell furiously.
"Your majesty, calm down. Caleb told us that if anything was to happen to him, we would deliver his decree," he pauses to see my reaction.

"Well?" I ask bitterly.
"He wants you to take your place as queen and steer the country in the right direction. He trusted you would do it right." The man informs me in a quite snobbish voice.
"No!" I state bluntly.
"It was his dying wish," the man pushes.
"If it was Caleb's dying wish then I will take me place as queen. But not for anybody else - only Caleb," I say selfishly whilst walking out.

All I want to do is run away, become a new person and grow up once again. I don't want the burden of heart break, the guilt of murder and the loneliness of having no one. I want Caleb. I don't think I'll ever break through the ghost of him. I don't want to be queen it binds me to the war but I have if Caleb wants me to.

Opening the door to my room, I sink to the ground. They always said heartbreak was bad but that is an understatement. I love Caleb and I'd endure all the pain again if I could call him my own.

The tears pool in my eyes and spill like waterfalls. My heavy heart feels burdened and bruised. My will to live has shattered.

Wasn't it easier in my childhood days?

This grief is like living two lifes: one where I try to pretend I'm fine and the other when I break down faster than you can say loss. The pain I'm feeling is like waves of the ocean, sometimes it comes calmly and other times it is so overwhelming and the only thing I can do is learn how to swim. In the end it never gets better it just keeps coming down in a kaliedoscope of memories.

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Authors Note:-

This book is NOT finished, there will probably be two or three more chapters. So what do your think?

Any opinions-

Vote and comment please.