The Light House Girl.

Chapter 53

The picnic was a disaster. There were several reasons for it. The first being it was plain cold. Not cool, not a good weather at all. No, it was simply cold. Cold enough for us not to want to be stranded at the park. But our cries of despair fell on deaf ears of May and Daniel who planned this little picnic getaway apparently. Now for the other reason. We four were supposed to be cheery and hold the group up. We were supposed to be happy and enjoy this day. But we were not. For several different reasons. I, for one kept waiting when they would break the silence, and everything would fall apart. Krystal seemed she was lost in her thoughts, yet she never left my side. I mean she did show me her scars as well. I am sure it brought back memories for her as well. Jess well she kind of shrunk in on herself. If that was even possible. Riley. Well she was fighting the urge to scream something and be there for me, constantly, from the moment we woke up.

The twins were having fun, running around, playing with themselves, pulling me. But I was not in a great mood myself. I was happy, there was no doubt about it. Because my friends saw me and accepted me. But my happiness came at a price. And the price was when will all of it end. Because for some reason as soon as I woke up, I could not get rid of the nagging feeling I felt at the back of mind that all of this was soon coming to an end. I would have said, I don't believe it had I not witnessed firsthand the changes on my friends. Ryan was himself, but his bugging us would not get us to bulge either. I am sure we all kept giving the rest of them fake smiles which we all somehow mustered in a few hours. Another thing which we did was not look at each other. No. No matter what no eye contact was made. I did see Krystal look at me several times, but we never made eye contact. I am not sure what is going on in her head, but her cheeks displayed a tint of redness. I assumed it must be because of the cold.

This strange behavior and the rather calm before the storm kind of atmosphere continued till the end of the day. When I could not take it anymore and I went to my room. I just wanted to sleep and hoped that the next day would be better. It was strange as I cannot even remember when the others came to the room. I must have been asleep. When I woke up, I found Krystal on my bed, but she was not hugging me or near me for that matter. That was the first thing I noticed. I didn't pay much heed to it thinking she must have shifted in her sleep. But it still left an almost bitter taste in my mouth and brought back the nagging I felt yesterday.

I didn't know what happened after we got back from the picnic yesterday. But something happened that much was very apparent from everyone's faces. Strangely none of them looked me in the eye. Great! But it did not make me angry like I hoped. It did make me feel uneasy. A lot. There were subtle changes at first. Ade and Jane not giving me bear hugs, May and Daniel whispering along with Jessica and Thomas. Jess or Eve seemed to have detached herself from her mom. Her mom Hannah was with her siblings and they were talking with each other but not really talking. Like it was all for a show. Only one totally normal was Riley. Well normal for Riley, which meant she was talking to me, and stopping like she always did. But she was herself. Krystal seemed to have disappeared after we woke up just like Kate. Only company I had constantly was Hunter and Holland. Even Ryan was behaving weirdly.

This continued for two days. Two freaking days. And it puzzled the hell out of me. It was not that they were avoiding me. No. In fact they purposefully made sure they were not. But also, at the same time it felt like they were all sidestepping me. Like they can be around me but not exactly around me. I would have thought they were walking on eggshells around me as if I would break. But that was not it either. They were still not making eye contact with me. The teddy bear hugs receded. There were hugs but those were not the ones I was missing. Ryan seemed to get angry every 5 minutes at almost the weirdest of things. But there were no looks of pity. No. That's what threw me off completely. Because I was certain all this new strange behavior had something to do with them learning about my scars. But I expected pity from them, and I did not see that.