Twisted Touch

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I haven't felt your touch in what feels like eternity,
and yet i feel it in almost every finger that brushes my skin.
Even when i'm with someone new,
i have to remind myself who they are
because my being only craves you.
I finally was held and caressed by him,
the one i swore would never reciprocate my longing,
the thought never crossed my mind,
but he did.
I laid in his bed, in his arms,
yet had to remind myself they weren't yours,
his hair wasn't yours,
your breathing and heart beat are different.
Refusing to close my eyes to not picture you,
I held his face in my hand as he spoke about everything and nothing.
If I turned away, he became you.
Although I was glowing from simply being in his presence,
the moment his hand touched my waist,
his fingers touched my hair,
and his lips touched mine,
it felt like you.
Your touch would soothe me every day,
and now it drives me to the brink of insanity and i'm getting better at holding myself back from falling off the edge.
He was always a dream and now it's my reality,
i pray that some day i can replace your touch with his,
and in a few years i'll have a skin you never tainted,
a body that was never yours,
and a heart finally complete again.

My (endless) YearWhere stories live. Discover now