It Beats For You

Where Did I Go Wrong?

Raven decided he was going to go to bed after a while, and went to his and Dante’s room.

Dante and I sat out in the living room for a little bit longer, until I stood up and went to the kitchen, pulling open the fridge.

Dante called out that he was going to go chill with Raven for a few, but I didn’t care.

I was pretty numb.

I pulled out a bottle of vodka and a glass. I don’t know why I bothered, though, because I had the whole bottle gone in a few minutes.

I felt a little better, but not near enough. Forgetting that Dante and Raven were in the apartment, and that Sammi Doll and Andy and everyone else would probably be pissed off at me for what I was about to do, but to be honest: I couldn’t care less.

I walked into the bathroom and picked up a box out of my cabinet that was reserved for me. Dante had his own cabinet too. Out of the box, I took my razor. Andy and Dante thought I’d thrown it away.

I hadn’t.

I couldn’t.

I glanced in the mirror and stopped in my tracks. My hair was messed up a bit, my eyes were dark and tired looking, and my shoulders sagged. I looked…older than I was.

I leaned against the wall, staring into space. I couldn’t make myself bleed…I already looked horrible.

What seemed like seconds later, but in reality was hours later, I heard someone knocking on the bathroom door.

“Rain? What the fuck are you doing in there? Did you drink all the vodka? By yourself?”

When I didn’t answer, I saw the door handle turn and Dante came in. He stood still for a moment, taking in the scene before him.

“Oh, Rain…please tell me you didn’t.” He whispered, indicated the razor.

“Do you see any blood, Dante?”

“No. That’s good. It would’ve been months, down the drain.”

“I’m tired, Dante…” I said, still kind of staring off into space.

“Come on, then…” He replied heavily, coming over and putting his arms around me to lift me up. “Let’s get you to bed.”

He was soft and warm and I liked it. A little too much, I think.

He carried me to my room and set me on my new bed.

“Thanks, D.” I said quietly, curling up under the covers.

He kissed my forehead. “No problem. Don’t ever scare me like that again. Do you know how fucking PISSED Andy would be?”

“I know…I know and I’m sorry. I promise I won’t do it again.” I felt like a little kid being scolded.

“Good. Now get to sleep. You’ve had one hell of a day, and we have to go back to the doctor’s tomorrow. Raven wants you there; you ARE his sister.”

“Okay. I’ll be there.”

“Okay. Goodnight, Rain.”

“G’night, Dante.”

He exited my room and I closed my eyes, falling into an instant sleep.

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O.O So. Much. Drama. Coming. Up. And stuff. Reviews? Reviews are awesome. :D