No Control | Holding Me Ransom (Book 2)

4 - Is It So Wrong?

"I can't believe you've agreed to see her."

Callie was staring at me in disbelief over her glass of wine.

"I didn't exactly agree," I protested weakly.

"Well it sounds like it to me," she said bluntly.

We were sitting at my kitchen table discussing Karen's phonecall and tomorrow's meeting.

"I know it sounds crazy but I just feel like I haven't really had the full truth about all this," I tried to explain, reaching for the Doritos that were in the bowl between us. "I feel like there's something she's not telling me."

"Or, she's trying to make you think that to get you over there so she can coerce you into this stupid pretend-girlfriend-business," Callie suggested.

"I'm not getting involved in that," I declared. "I know you think I'm going to change my mind," I continued when she opened her mouth to protest, "but trust me, I wouldn't lower myself. I've been humiliated enough."

"But... Jess..," she began, and I knew by the way she was thinking carefully before she spoke that I wasn't going to like what she was about to say. "Look what happened when you went to Brussels. You were adamant you weren't going to forgive him and you ended up asking him to take you back."

"It wasn't quite like that," I said uncomfortably.

"Near enough," she said gently, pulling the bowl towards her and dropping a couple of Doritos into her hand. "I just know you can't say no when it comes to him -"

"Actually, you're wrong," I snapped. "I've said no plenty of times, and it caused friction because he couldn't handle it. He's used to getting his own way, but he didn't with me, and he didn't like it."

"Sounds like a nice guy," Callie said sarcastically.

"It isn't his fault," I said quickly. "It's the fame that's done it. He clicks his fingers, everyone jumps. He doesn't take advantage of it or anything, but he's used to getting what he wants. Whether it be girls, arrangements or good PR - it's just the way his life is. Anyone would be the same in that situation. In fact, no. Most people would be complete arsehøles, but he's the exception."

Callie put her head in her hands.

"See, Jess, there you go again," she said. "Stop defending him. He treated you like dirt and all you can do is tell me he's not an arsehøle. This is why you shouldn't be going tomorrow. That woman will talk you into going along with whatever she demands, because she'll spin you some sob story about Harry and you'll take pity on him because you're still in love with him."

"I'm not completely stupid," I argued. "And I can't forgive him for this. I know I said that last time but he's hurt me again since then, so I am even more against giving in to any demands."

There was no point trying to deny I was still in love with Harry. But come on, it had only been four days since I found out he had been unfaithful. It takes time for these things to fade. I could still hate him while I loved him. Or love him while I hated him. Whatever.

"OK, so what if he's there when you turn up - "

"He won't be, they're touring."

"- and he's all emotional and he declares his love for you, says he's sorry and begs you to take him back."

"What the - That isn't going to happen!" I scoffed. "He doesn't love me! He told me that."

Callie opened her mouth to say something and then quickly shut it again. "You haven't answered my question," she said eventually, not meeting my eyes.