To Love in Full

Chapter 45: Saudade

Saudade (n.) A deep melancholic longing for something or someone, often accompanied with a denied truth that what one longs for will never come back.

Nicolo's POV

"So... you're telling me that my sister shot three people? Including Romano?" he asked stupidly, simply repeating the words that left my mouth a few seconds ago.

"Yes, that is what I said," I sighed impatiently.

I was becoming fed up with the conversation that I was having with Alexander as I thought it would be a good way to pass time, but I was greatly mistaken. I had told him about what happened with Arabella while he was away, but his simpleminded brain could only respond by being in disbelief or shock.

"Huh..." he said as he slowly nodded his head and stared blankly into the crowd with furrowed brows, but his staggered expression soon turned into a satisfied and proud smile.

"Do you think she-" he began to ask and I immediately slammed my glass onto the counter of the bar.

"I need to answer this call," I lied as I stood up and walked away. Far away.

If he was anyone else I would have told him to fuck off the second he opened his mouth to speak, but I knew Arabella would be displeased if she found out I treated him that way.

I stared at my phone restlessly, scrolling through the messages that I had sent Arabella minutes ago but never received a response to. She should be here by now, I thought as I searched my contact list for Gabe's number.

I was tired of waiting for her. I had waited for what felt like eternity to finally taste those seductive lips, but her absence deprived me of feeling complete, I was starting to feel isolated in this room filled with people.

"Hello?" Gabe answered once he accepted my call.

"Give Arabella the phone," I said.

"She's not here," he replied.

"What do you mean?" I asked worriedly. The next words that left his mouth made me feel overwhelmed with an emotion that I have not confronted in years, it was an emotion that I bring upon others, but now fear began to settle within me and I almost felt sympathy for those who were unfortunate enough to meet me.

"She left about an hour ago."

"Are you sure about this?" I asked as I began to panic.

"Yes," he sighed out nervously.

"I need you to meet us at the hotel and make sure you aren't being followed," I said through gritted teeth before ending the call.

My distress forced my strides into a hurried pace and my eyes scanned the room swiftly for the last person that I wanted to speak to. I set my eyes on Alexander and ignored the stares of desperate women as I walked by them and pushed through people that stood in my way of finding out what the fuck happened to my Arabella.

"Call your sister," I demanded once I reached him. For a second his face displayed confusion, but he wasted no time in calling her as he suspected something was wrong.

"She's not answering," he muttered as he tried to call her again.

"Cazzo, she left the estate one hour ago; it should only take her thirty minutes to drive here," I said (Fuck).

I began to search for my men and found them sitting at a table with a tray of our purest cocaine. Their little gathering came to an end once they noticed my enraged presence approaching them.

"Che cos'è?" Manny asked (What is it).

"Arabella is missing."

"Questa cagna...nuovamente? Does she have some kind of bounty on her head that we don't know about?" Leone asked and I immediately scowled at his choice of words, but my memories fueled my anger when I was reminded of the failed deal I had mindlessly made with Cairo.