Ryan: now, where the hell...
Jack: what'd you lose this time?
Ryan: my glasses; I've been searching for two hours now.
Jack, staring at the glasses on top of Ryan's head: I'll help you find them if you give me $10
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Adam: why were these melted chocolates in the oven? You could've burned the house down!
Ryan: you said you wanted hot chocolate.
Adam: RYAN, I SWEAR TO GOD–
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Jack, returning from his hiking trip with Ryan: I have some good and bad news.
Adam: good news first.
Jack: Ryan learned that mountain lions are not friends.
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Jack: I don't follow rules
Jack, opening Instagram: I follow dogs
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Adam: pass me the salt.
Ryan: what's the magic word?
Adam: or else.
Ryan: that's two words but point taken.
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Ryan: I got good news and bad news
Adam: tell me the good news.
Ryan: the airbags in your car work perfectly.
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Ryan: Hey, you two think I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Adam: you're a danger to yourself!
Jack: and a coward, do 20.
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Ryan: um, why is there a green owl standing threateningly outside?
Adam, furiously typing on his phone: I didn't finish today's Japanese lesson
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*Jack gets hit by a car*
Ryan: Jack! Oh my god! are you okay?!
Jack: I n-need...my...p-phone...
Ryan, handing him his phone: y-yea! Right! We have to call 911!
*Jack opens Twitter*
Jack: GUESS WHAT JUST HAPPENED!
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Adam: Jack, what did you do? What the fuck did you do? THERE ARE FBI AGENTS OUTSIDE, AND YOU'RE WATCHING YOUTUBE?
*Jack continues playing youtube*
Ryan, holding the door back from the FBI: FUCK YOU!
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Adam: hey Ryan, I typed 'Bitch' into my GPS, and guess what? I'm in your driveway!
Ryan: Adam, it's 2 in the morning.
Adam: vroom vroom, motherfucker
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Jack: we need to get through this locked door; Ryan, quick, give me your credit card!
Ryan: here!
Jack, pocketing it: cool. Now, Adam, kick down the door!
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Jack: I just tried watermelon on pizza, and honestly? It's delicious!
Adam: that's him, officer. That's the guy right there. Shoot him before he gets away.
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Ryan: butter is just food lotion
Adam: please stop talking forever.
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Jack: we're playing Scrabble. It's a nightmare.
Ryan: Scrabble? Scrabble's great!
Jack: when you're playing with Adam, it's not. he keeps using words like "antidisestablishmentarianism," and I put "egg."
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Jack: have you ever been to an animal hospital?
Adam: what? no
*Adam imagines a cat with a tiny stethoscope*
Adam: but now I want to.
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Instructor: welcome to salsa class! Who's ready to learn how to dance?
Ryan, hiding a bag of tortilla chips behind his back: there has been a misunderstanding
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Police: you're under arrest for attempting to carry three people on a single motorcycle.
Jack: well, shit – wait...did you say three?
Police: yes, three.
Jack: OH NO
Police: is there a problem?
Jack: WHO THE FUCK DIDN'T TELL ME THAT SHAY FELL OFF!
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*Ryan steps outside for only two seconds*
Ryan: it's hot out here; I don't want to be out here.
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Adam: take only what you need to survive.
*Jack grabs Shay*
Adam: what's this...I said to take only what you need to survive.
Jack: I can't live without her!
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YOU ARE READING
AJR incorrect quotes
HumorThese are just things I thought about AJR at 3 am ⚠︎ sᴛᴏʀʏ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴ: sᴛʀᴏɴɢ ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ⚠︎︎ 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈: 𝑯𝒂𝒕𝒆 = 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌 Finished: February 2, 2023
