Adam: I'm Jack's emergency contact.
Nurse: so You're here to pick him up?
Adam: I'm here to remove myself as an emergent contact.
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Ryan: dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life.
Jack: fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?
Ryan: unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, and beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate can never destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die.
Adam: edible
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Jack: Now I'm crying. You made me cry
Ryan: Baby
Jack: No! Now is not the time for pet names
Ryan: No, I'm calling you a baby. I'm insulting you.
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Jack: "beat three eggs" In what? Hand-to-hand combat?
Ryan: Yeah, I thought that at first, too, But it's one reason why Adam stopped allowing weapons in the kitchen.
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Ryan: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Jack: Oh yeah? You're the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Ryan: I'm leaving you, and I'M TAKING SHAY WITH ME
Adam, picking up the monopoly board: I think we're going to stop playing now.
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Jack: it's decorative
Adam: that doesn't change the fact that it's a fucking gun
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Ryan: I learned some precious lessons from this.
Adam: I'm guessing they are all horrible distortions of the lessons you should've taken away.
Jack: Death isn't natural, and I am God.
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Ryan: I just saw Adam cry in the library, and then his phone alarm went off, and he just stopped crying and went back to work.
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Jack: Must be hard not being able to laugh.
Adam: I do have a sense of humor, you know.
Ryan: I've never heard you laugh before.
Adam: I've never heard Jack say anything funny.
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Ryan: In light of what you did for me, you can hug me for four to five seconds.
Jack: FORTY-FIVE SECONDS?!
Ryan: No! Four to five seconds!
Jack: Too late!
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Ryan: oh, to be a goose and wreak absolute havoc
Adam: you can wreak havoc without being a goose
Ryan: yeah, but Id feel no remorse if I was a goose!
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Interviewer: Dumbest scar stories, go!
Ryan: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.
Adam: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.
Jack: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.
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Jack: I wish for once someone would call me "sir" without adding "you're making a scene."
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Ryan: I can NOT believe you would be so foolish as to get contact traced. I can't believe it.
Jack: Wow, I know, so irresponsible, right
Ryan: you should simply not get covid
Jack: Wow, shocker, I can't believe I didn't think of that
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Adam: Welcome back, friends
Adam: and Jack
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Ryan: you don't get to choose your biological family.
Adam: you don't get to choose your found family either!! Buckle up bitch!!
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YOU ARE READING
AJR incorrect quotes
HumorThese are just things I thought about AJR at 3 am ⚠︎ sᴛᴏʀʏ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴ: sᴛʀᴏɴɢ ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ⚠︎︎ 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈: 𝑯𝒂𝒕𝒆 = 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌 Finished: February 2, 2023
