Ryan and Adam to Jack: Go to sleep, sweetheart. Pray for brains.
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*Ryan leaves the room*
Cat turns to Jack and Adam: Oh, I'm nuts about that guy!!
Jack and Adam: You'd have to be.
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Ryan: Would you like some spaghetti? It's delicious.
Jack: Did you make it?
Ryan: No
Jack: I'd love some!
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Jack: I just had a thought.
Adam: Congratulations.
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*Adam comes downstairs to find Jack and Ryan getting breakfast from his fridge*
Jack: Morning! You should really lock the backdoor, any idiot could walk in here.
Adam: And two idiots did.
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Ryan: Where are you going?
Adam: to get some air
Ryan: We got air in the house.
Adam: I don't like dumb thoughts in my air.
----------------------------------------Ryan: I died.. I died and went to heaven!
Adam: you didn't die, Ryan. You passed out, you hallucinated.
Ryan: no, I know it sounds crazy but its true! It really is! I died and went to heaven! Well, it wasn't actually heaven proper. It was somewhere on the outskirts.
Jack: you died and went to a suburb of heaven..?
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*When Jack is sick*
Jack: Isn't it amazing how I can feel so bad and still look so good?
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Ryan: Subversive?
Adam: As in, "Do you advocate the overthrow of the government by force or violence?"
Jack: Oh. ... Violence.
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Adam: You gonna be okay?
Ryan: I'll be fine. I've got everything I need.
Adam: You've also got brothers who loves you.
Jack: And Dad's nose.
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*Adam explaining the length of something*
Jack: is it as long as a subway foot long?
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Adam: look, you didn't ask me for my opinion, but i'm old, so i'm giving it anyway.
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Therapist: do you know what your trouble is?
Jack: of course not.
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Adam: what are you listening to?
Ryan: a relaxation tape. The rain is supposed to relax me.
Adam: is it working?
Ryan: not really. I keep worrying that I left my car windows down.
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Jack: people waste time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Me, I drink whatever's in the glass.
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Jack: I'm so uncomfortable around strangers.
Adam: and they're just as uncomfortable around you.
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Fan: Ryan, can you answer a few questions?
Ryan: As long as it's not math.
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Jack: Maybe you're right.
Adam: Of course I'm right. You think I got this old by being stupid?
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Ryan: Adam, Jack isn't talking to me.
Adam: Enjoy it while it lasts.
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Jack: aw man, my phone died, I should have listened to that 10% warning
Ryan: people usually don't listen to those notification
Jack: well, they should or they end up like me.
Adam: that's a scary thought
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Ryan stares deadpan into the camera with a microphone in hand: And here you can see the endangered Jack in his natural habitat.
*Jack falls down the stairs, spilling his cereal everywhere*
Ryan: Natural selection is coming for this specimen.
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Adam: How do you keep an idiot waiting?
Jack: I don't know, how?
Adam: I'll tell you later.
Jack: Okay...
*30 min later*
Jack: Wait a damn second...
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YOU ARE READING
AJR incorrect quotes
HumorThese are just things I thought about AJR at 3 am ⚠︎ sᴛᴏʀʏ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴ: sᴛʀᴏɴɢ ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ⚠︎︎ 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈: 𝑯𝒂𝒕𝒆 = 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌 Finished: February 2, 2023
