The Epilogue - Katniss and Peeta

He left me.

*Katniss's POV*
I stare at the letter. My guess is that the letter is full of words that tell the story of her hatred towards me and then enmity she feels. I don't want to open this letter, I have enough hate for myself, I don't need another's opinion on my worthless being.

"You should read it, Katniss." Peeta says while walking towards me. I glance at him and shake my head.
"I don't think that's a good idea." I say while holding the letter in my hand. "I don't think I can handle reading Annie's endless paragraphs on Finnick."

"Annie wouldn't do that." He remarks while walking into the kitchen. "I'm not sure she can bring herself to eve think about him, let alone write about it."

I follow him and I lean against the counter as I brace for myself for opening the letter, knowing Peeta will open it either way. I begin to peel the letter open, but I falter and stop before I even see the piece of paper inside.

My hand trembles slightly, but I resolve it by handing the letter over to Peeta. He gives me a look as I do so, but I just shake my head as an answer. I assume he understands, because he doesn't say anymore.

"You'll be happy to hear that Katniss's mother has been training new medical units in the capital. Gale has been promoted to be a captain in District 2 to help keep order and security." He begins to read the letter out loud, and I cringe at the reminder of Gale.
"And I am loving every moment with my son, who reminds me every day of his father." I turn to look at him, remembering every single second I spent with Finnick—all of my memories coming in flashes that dance through my mind.

"We've all suffered so much. But we owe it to their memories and to our children to do the best with these lives. I hope you're both finding some peace, Annie." Peeta looks away and places the letter on the table.

He picks up a small piece of paper and come closer to me, angling the picture so I can see. I find the photo to be a picture of Annie, and in her arms is a small boy with green eyes like Annie, yet golden hair like his father. I stare in awe at the child, who looks so identical to him.

"He resembles Finnick so much." I say, with tears in my eyes.

Peeta nods, but his face turns once he sees my expression. I fight back the tears that fill my eyes, and I feel him pull me into his chest. I stand there, reliving every second of those sewers.

"He should be alive to see him, Peeta." I start quietly. "This is all my fault."

"It's not your fault, darling. Finnick sacrificed himself fighting for what he believed in, and I know he wouldn't want to see you so distraught over him." He takes his hands to my face and wipes away my stream of tears, holding my face gently in his palms. "If he was here right now, he'd definitely be laughing at you for crying over him."

I laugh softly at the thought of him making fun of me, even though I miss him so terribly. Now that Prim is gone, I'm not sure what I have left anymore. If I had the chance, I think I would've swapped places for him. Nobody needs me, and yet the person others do need is gone—because of me.

"I'm going to go lie down." I say quietly, backing away from him arms. He nods at me, but I notice he watches carefully as I leave and walk into the living room. I fall down onto the couch, letting my thoughts run through my head.

It's my fault. I sent the bomb into the sewers. It was my choice that killed him—I should've jumped down there and grabbed him, I—I could've saved him. There's so much that I could've done to save him. Yet I froze, and watched him become a mutt meal.

Finnick had a reason to live, and I don't. All of the people I've lost along the way have had a reason to live, yet it hasn't been enough. I'm the cursed one. I'm the one who has to feel all of the pain. Everyday I regret not taking that nightlock pill sooner, maybe I could've avoided all of these hardships.