Hospitals and Sorrows.

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*Katniss's POV*

I wake up suddenly, to loud noises coming from downstairs. I'm startled by a series of crashes and bangs, and I look over to see Peeta not in bed. I soon realize that the only truly logical explanation is him, and him having an attack.

I quickly run out of the bedroom, and I'm halfway down the stairs when I pause.
If I go down there, there's a possibility I could coax him out of the attack. But, I also remember that Peeta really wanted me to stay away while he's experiencing an attack. I know how deeply he wanted me to stay away, which urges me to climb back up the steps. Suddenly, I hear him call out to me.

"Mutt." I turn around and see Peeta staring at me.
"Wait—" I remark quickly before he starts running towards me. I bolt up the stairs and into our bedroom, loxinh it whilst pushing the dresser quickly against the door to reinforce it. My eyes dart around the room, and I spot a chair in the corner. I carry it towards the barricaded door, and I begin push it against the wooden door, until I hear him banging on the door. I run over towards my bedside table and quickly search for my blade. "Where is it?" I say rummaging through the drawers.

I took it downstairs.

I quickly back into the corner of the room. I know he can get through the door without a doubt. It's a waiting game to see if he'll get through before the attacks over. I see the door knob turn and I hear the lock go off. Stupid lock. I see him crack the door open and watch him try to slide the dresser.
I stand up as he opens the door fully and he stands there.

"Listen, Peeta—" I start. "I'm not a mutt."
"You're a capital mutt," he begins. I look towards him and his eyes are dilated.

It's not him. It's not him. It's not him.

He starts walking towards me and I back up until I hit the wall. I brace myself—he could choke me at any moment. I close my eyes preparing myself but instead he picks me up by my shoulders. I shriek.

"You're trying to kill me." He says looking into my eyes. I plead with my eyes, begging him to listen to me.
"I'm not a mutt," I start as my voice breaks, "I—I love you."
"You're lying to me," he remarks, with no emotion towards me. He throw me against the ground and I meet the floor with a thud. I cry out in pain, I felt something crack.
"Please listen," I beg as I use my arms as protection against my face. But I chose to regret that decision, as he picks me up.
He lifts me up by my neck and pins me against the wall. I gasp for air as I can barely breathe. "Please." I barely creak. I look into his eyes and I see nothing.
He's not there. This isn't him. He wouldn't do this to me. I feel my body begin to go numb and my vision starts to go black. I take what seems to be my last breathe.

It'll be okay. All of my family is dead, I'll be reunited. I should've died a long time ago. This is just how it was supposed to go, I was never meant for the happily ever after. I was never meant to be anything besides a piece in their games.
I meet the floor with a thud. I look over as I breathe in shortly and see Peeta looking at me shocked.
Suddenly, the whole room goes dark.

_

I wake up suddenly in a hospital room. I panic, looking around the room for anything familiar. I feel a sharp pain in the right side of my hip as I move too drastically. I wince at the pain before spotting Peeta walking towards me.

"Katniss, I'm so sorry—" he starts. His eyes are red and puffy, and his voice breaks.
"I'm fine." I creak as the memories begin to flood back in. I'm surprised my voice even manages to work.
How am I not dead? I'm supposed to be dead.
"I hurt you." He says looking at the ground. It feels as if my heart shatters piece by piece. I don't want him to carry another burden, he doesn't deserve it. He didn't mean to hurt me, he didn't mean it.
"I'm just glad you're alright. It doesn't even hurt." I lie while closing my eyes to prevent tears from falling down my face. "How did I get here anyways?" I ask whoever moving slightly. A sharp pain shoots through my lower half, but I don't react.
"They sent an aircraft."
"Great." I mutter. "So the reporters got it on camera."
"It doesn't matter," he starts but I cut him off.
"They'll make you look like some kind of monster." I begin while picturing the headlines. They can't be good. I just wish they'd leave us alone.
"Maybe I am after what I did," he mumbles quietly. I give him a look and his face doesn't change.
"Peeta, you're not a monster."
"I'm just going to keep hurting you." He says ashamed.
"It's not your fault and you've only hurt me twice."
"What about in district 13? Oh, and that tar stuff?"
"That's different." I remark while looking down.
"It's not, Katniss. I just keep hurting and hurting you." His voice nearly breaks on the end, and I can sense the sadness brewing within him.
I wish he would let this go, I'm barely injured.

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