The Epilogue - Katniss and Peeta

Forgiveness.

*Katniss's POV*

I stare at the window across from where I'm lying down, and I revel in the emptiness of my thoughts. I feel weightless and my mind roams into the dark hollows of my brain. Nothingness peacefully occupies my time, and I don't mind it.

Suddenly—interrupting my quiet—a short knock on my door rings through my ears and then the door handle moves, creating a slight creaking noise as the doors opened.

I turn over to watch him walk through the doorway carrying a tray, with a few flowers surrounding the other things along the tray. I begin to sit up and I eventually lean back on the headboard as he stands beside the edge of the bed.

"I brought you some medicine in case you have a headache, and some water if you're thirsty." He starts while setting the tray down beside me. I look at the flowers and admire their petals. "If you need anything else, let me know."
Too quickly, he begins to back away and starts his way out the door. I hesitate with my words, deciding whether or not to speak, but I ultimately choose to do so.

"Peeta?" I croak through my raspy voice, which I've barely used in the past days. He immediately turns around and his eyes meet mine. "Why do you care about me so much?" I ask quietly and it almost looks as if he's taken aback by the question.
"You're everything to me, Katniss. I'm always going to love and care about you, even in your most stubborn times." He remarks softly, and it provokes a slight smile from my face.
"You still love me, even when I look like this?" I ask gesturing to my face, and he raises an eyebrow while leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed at his chest.
"You look as beautiful as always." He says.
"I look sickly." I start. "My face is sunken and my cheekbones are prominent. My body is tiny, and you can see my collarbones."

It's true. I look like a twig that could snap in a gust of wind. I appear no more than a small waste of space. An overlooking glance would skim past me, moving onto another woman who actually has something besides bones to her body.
He shrugs before speaking.
"You're perfect to me." He begins, but he's cut off.

By the sound of the front door slamming.

I jump, quickly moving out of the bed and standing within a mere second. My eyes widen and I can feel my body shaking.
"Pl—Please tell me that's not Gale." I stutter in between shallow breaths.

I hear the sound of footsteps on the stairs and my heart races faster with each sound. Peeta leans back to see down the stairs and then looks back at me.

"You're okay." He reassures me while closing the door behind him. "It's just Willow."
"Are—Are you sure?" I start. "Because that could easily—" A tear falls down my face and he walks towards me.

As soon as I feel his arms embrace me, I break down. My whole body shakes and tears fly off my cheeks. One of his hands hold the back of my head to his chest, while the other draws small circles on my lower back. My heart races faster than I did to the cornucopia, and I can't catch my breath.

I try to mutter that I can't breathe but he nods his head and continues the circles.
"Take a deep breath in and hold it for 10 seconds, Katniss." He hushes me, and I try to do what he says. "Now exhale for 10 seconds. Keep repeating it until you can feel your heart slow down."

I don't know why I'm so shaken by the sound of a door closing. I thought I had moved on from what Gale had done. That was in the past, and I thought I could forget about it. If I didn't think about it, it didn't affect me. But now, I'm scared of a sound? How can I possibly go from the leader of the revolution, to a sick woman who moves twice a day and is scared of noises.
I don't understand.

I pull away and look up at him.
"I want to be normal." My voice threatens to break, but I refuse to let it. He begins to speak but I cut him off. "I don't want to cry over the sound of a door opening and closing. I don't want to look sick and brittle. I want to be normal, so bad."
"Katniss," he brushes the hair off my face and gives me a look. "You're perfect just the way you are."