𝐁𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐞, ᵐᵃᵗᵗʰᵉᵒ ʳⁱᵈᵈˡᵉ

ꜱɪʟᴇɴᴛ ᴛᴇᴀʀꜱ

𝐒𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤

Another moment of silence passed by as I stared at the dark sky.

And another tear fell down my cheek as I watched the rain pour down in front of me.

The feeling of the cold water didn't bother me at that moment.

Because every time a tear fell, a raindrop fell.

It felt like I wasn't crying alone. That I could instead feel the comfort from someone crying with me.

The sky.

Some days are harder.

Even if I feel happy most of the time, some days become harder to manage.

It felt wrong to grieve someone I can still feel. Every second I was awake I could feel him. Every second I was asleep I could feel him.

I can't accept that he's gone.

I can't accept someone to be gone when it still feels like they're here.

My eyes focused on the star highest in the sky, the one who always shone the brightest when I needed it to.

No matter what anyone else says, this sucks.

Pain.

Grief.

Loneliness.

What happened can't be made right and what I have lost can't be found.

People talk about grief in all different kinds of ways.

That it's something that makes us more real. That it's something that comes with life, something you learn from.

And some think of it as a lesson.

But then there's the real reason behind grief.

It comes when you least expect it. It swallows you whole.

Some might say that you learn to put it behind you. That you can live happily again by trying to be happy and move on.

But I don't need a solution to the pain.