My Not Exactly Bully Boyfriend(bxb)

25.

After a while I went to take a shower. Jer came and picked me up. He drove in silence like he was angry about something. I know that he doesn't believe me when I told him that nothing happened between me and Ben. Nothing. Even though he kissed me. But he doesn't have to know about that because it was a mistake that should've never happened.

After a couple of minutes he knocked on the door. "Hey." He said as I opened the door. He gave me a hug. Because of my bad mood I had to put up a fake smile. "You ready?"

I nodded. I took my phone and house keys and locked the door then we left. We got into his car and drove off. I couldn't look at him knowing that I'm hurting him so I looked out the window.

Even though he was talking I couldn't hear what he was saying. I was busy thinking about Ben. I can't stop thinking about him even though I'm with my boyfriend. Which is so wrong. I seriously need to stop or I'll lose my boyfriend, which I love.

"Babe?" I got snapped out of my thoughts. "Babe, are you okay."

"Uh- I'm fine. Just, thinking."

"About what?" He looked concerned.

"Uhm- nothing important."

He looked curious now. "Are you sure?" I nodded yes. "Okay then. Where do you wanna go?"

"Any where's fine."

"Okay. Which songs do you wanna listen to?"

"Any is fine."

"You know if you don't wanna go out with me it's fine. I can take you back home." He got annoyed by me not paying attention to him.

"No I do."

"Then why won't you talk to me?"

"I-I just have a lot on my mind."

"What is it?"

"It's nothing."

"I knew you were thinking about that friend of yours."

"No, I'm not thinking about him."

"If not then who?"

"I-I'm not thinking about anyone."

"Exactly. Not even me." He turned the car around.

"No, I was thinking about you."

"You know, I don't know what's up with you lately. You're different."

"No. I'm still the same."

"I'll take you home."

"No, please don't. You said we'll hang out today."

"How can we hang out when you don't even pay attention to me."

"I am paying attention."

"No you are not. Ever since your friend came you've been out of it."

"Okay, you're right. I'm sorry. Now can we please hang out."

"I change my mind. I have to go to work." He stopped at my driveway.

"Please tell me what I did wrong?"

"You've done nothing wrong." He didn't look at me, showing that he is angry at me.

"Please don't be angry with me. You know that...."

"I'm not angry at you."

"Then why won't you look at me?"

"Why should I?"

I pulled his face to look at me. "Because your my boyfriend."

"That's what I also thought."

"Don't say that. You are my boyfriend." I pressed my lips on his soft one. Instead of kissing back he pushed me away. He's never done this before. He's very angry. "Jeremy?"

"Stop. Go."

"No, I'm not going until you stop being angry at me."

"Fine, I'm not angry."

"Yes you are."

"What do you want me to do? I've done everything I can to make you happy yet you still refuse me. I don't know what to do anymore."

"What do you mean I refuse you? I'm not refusing you."

"Then why don't you wanna have sex with me?"

"I-" I froze. I didn't want to have sex while still in school. I wanted it after marriage. Girly, I know. "You know why."

"Relationships don't last without sex."

"But ours has."

"I'm not even sure that it will last for much longer."

"What. Jeremy?"

"I'm sorry. Please go."

Years burned my cheeks. "I, Jeremy. Please don't do this to me. I'm sorry."

"Freddy...."

"Please. I'll stay away from Ben if it hurts you, just please don't break up with me." I pulled him with his shirt and cooped my face on his chest.

"Fred let go."

"No. You know I can't live without you."

"Look," he sighed. "I'm not breaking up with you."

"What." I slowly let go and looked into his beautiful blue eyes.

"You know I can't live without you." He pecked my lips. "Why would you think like that?" He smiled sadly.

"So...."

"I'm not mad at you."

A smile grew in my face. I pulled him in for a deep kiss. I thought my heart would break if he breaks up with me. I know I have a crush on Ben but I love Jeremy. He's my everything. I can't imagine my life without him. I can see us growing old together.

He tried to depart our lips but I pulled him back. I don't want to loose this moment. The I let him go. "Do you still want to go out?" He asked. I nodded. "You know what, I have a better idea."