Chosen (Sebastian x Reader)

Chapter 47

Your Pov 

I'm currently sitting in my study reading the book Sebastian gave me. I began to flip through the various pages, most of the text I couldn't understand. Due to the fact that it was in a foreign language. But, I could make out and decipher some of the 'teachings' by the various faded pictures.

"Hmm, whats this?" I thought out load and flattened the page and traced the image. The image depicted two beings and showed a wire connecting their minds together. I looked around the page for any clues but, the words looked like gibberish. 

knock, knock 

"Come in." I said .I looked up, saw the door open, and Ciel walked in. 

"What are you reading?" He asked and I leaned back into my leather swivel chair. 

"I'm just trying to understand what these pictures/words mean." I said and Ciel walked forward and leaned over my desk and grabbed the book. 

silence

"hmm, interesting." Ciel tapped his chin. 

"Did you figure something out?" I asked.

"Nope, that looks like a blob of ink." Ciel replied and I fell over on to my desk. 

"This is hopeless." I mumbled and Ciel patted my head. 

"Who even gave you this?" he asked and I sighed.

"Sebastian." I replied and Ciel sat down in front of me. 

"Why though?" He asked and I just shrugged. 

"I don't understand him at all." I said and Ciel paused. 

"Well, he always does things for a reason and...wait whats that on your neck?" Ciel asked and I sat up and tilted my head. 

"Is there something there?" I asked and got up and walked over to a mirror. I tilted my head and noticed that my mark has spread further. 

"Y/n?" Ciel asked and I just turned and went and sat down on a lounge chair. I looked back over at Ciel who has his arms crossed. 

"It's fine don't worry about it, why don't you tell me how you've been doing?" I said. 

"Really?" He asked and I shrugged. 

silence 

"Look, I just don't want to talk about it. I'm just stressed right now and confused. I just need to figure things out by myself right now." I said 

"But, wouldn't it be better to talk about it, I'm worried about you (nickname)." Ciel said. 

"You have nothing to worry about." I replied and he sighed. 

"Alright, I understand." Ciel replied and looked down at the floor. I looked back at him and then down at my desk. I heard him sigh and then start to walk away. 

"Ciel wait, I-" I said and he turned and smiled. 

"Don't worry about it, but, whatever you need to figure out. Best figure it out soon, we both don't have much time left." Ciel replied and left.  I leaned my head against my fist and grabbed the book.  

'Why didn't you tell him?' I heard I voice say in my head. 

'Oh so, you were listening huh? Why don't you just come talk to me in person?' I thought and tapped my desk. I looked up and saw my door open and Sebastian walked in and shut the door behind him. 

"I figured you would have told him." Sebastian said and sat in front of me. 

"He doesn't need to know, he needs to focus on himself and I need to do the same." I replied and Sebastian tilted his head and smirked. 

"Very well. I see you are looking at the book I gave you." He said and grabbed the book looked at the page I had open. 

"Yes, did you purposely give me a book I can't understand?" I asked.

"You know, if you ask nicely, I could teach you what it says." Sebastian replied and I rubbed my face in frustration.

"I am really tired of these games Sebastian." I replied and he hummed. 

"Then just stop resisting." Sebastian replied. 

"Why, this doesn't effect you." I replied and he pinched he nose. 

"Then let me show you something." Sebastian replied and unbuttoned his shirt and I noticed the mark had traveld across his chest and was close to his neck. 

"Huh, what.." I said and he placed his head against his palm. 

"We are tied together, so whatever happens to you, happens to me. So, if you keep deciding to resist the mark, you won't be the only being that loses control." Sebastian replied. 

"You are making no sense, one minute you say this and another time you contradict yourself. How can I tell that you are not lying? Isn't this what you ultimately want?" I asked 

"When I said, it was going to be either you or me that harms your family or friends. I wasn't talking about it independently. Someone or one of us has to drive the mark. either one of us can can control how that mark reacts. It focuses on emotions, do you remember you random outbursts? Or-" Sebastian said and I interrupted him. 

"Then are you talking about coldness I feel in my chest, when you are angry or upset?" I asked and he tilted his head. 

"In a way yes, your body reacts differently every time I express a powerful emotion." Sebastian replied. 

"So now, what you just want me to submit and give up?" I asked and he looked off to the side. 

"No, it doesn't matter what I think. If I really wanted to continue down this path, I could just erase your memories once more and force you into this relationship. But, you still have to decide." Sebastian replied. 

"But, what do you want?" I asked and Sebastian turned and smiled at me. 

"Haven't you figured it out already? I want you, I want you to be by my side for eternity. You bring me joy and at the same time grief. But, that's not what you want, I'm guessing?" Sebastian replied and looked at me. 

"I don't know what I want. I just want things to be how they were back then. Everything was fine, I trusted you and now it feels like I don't know you at all. I feel like you are going to keep manipulating me and how can I be ok with that?" I replied.

"I just wanted you to continue to be 'you'. I felt like you would lose your spark that made you who you are." Sebastian replied. 

"So lying to me was a better solution?!" I yelled and he sighed. 

"No, it wasn't. but, I got in too deep. I could see you fading away and then I became angry, jealous, and controlling. So, I'm sorry for that, but I am still a demon after, I can only control so much." Sebastian replied. 

"You think, that's just going to make everything magically better? Like I'm just going to run back into your arms like some child you met all those years ago. But, I'm not that person anymore, I'm broken. You broke me." I replied and grabbed a handful of my dress. 

"Yes, I did. but, if you forgive me or not, I will deal with it. But, will you deal with the consequences of your choices, your own choices. You still have one more choice to make and you don't have much time before that mark takes over." Sebastian replied and buttoned his shirt. I watched him walk to my door and pause. 

"Whatever you decide, I'll be here waiting." Sebastian said and left.