The Girl With The Tattoo

17. daddy's little girl

Lexi

I didn't get to see Sophie today. She'd texted me to let me know that she had the day off of dance to focus on her studies. It didn't feel right to be at the studio without her. I had to put up with Isabella's glares without the comfort of Sophie being beside me.

It's getting late and I should get to sleep so I pull myself out of bed to turn off my lamp. And just as I'm doing that, I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror...

Oh no...

Not now! Not today!

I notice the back of my pants covered in a bright red stain which can only mean one thing. I'd really hoped that my period would hold off for another week until I'd gotten enough money for tampons.

Shit, not even Carl has enough money to help me out with this!

I think about using some paper from the bathroom to get me through the night but I don't want to risk staining my sheets– dad would be furious!

So instead of doing that, I realise that I'm going to have to talk to my dad about this. My hands begin to shake as I make my way through to the living room where he's sat watching his favourite show.

And as I open the door, he immediately notices me, his head darting in my direction...

"Alexa?" He questions why I'm here "What's going on?"

He pauses the TV and I'm shaking even more than I was before "C-can- can I talk to you about something?"

"Yeah, of course you can. You can talk to me about anything."

I step further into the room, my dad standing up from his chair and I say this to him "I need some money to go to the store."

He furrows his brows, clearly confused as to why I'd need to go and buy something so late "For what? The stores almost closing, it's 9:30 pm."

"I- I just need to go and get something, that's all." I admit to him, making sure to leave out what it is exactly that I need.

"What could you possibly need so late at night?"He asks me, and I'm now starting to realise that I'm going to have to tell him what it is.

Usually, I'd deal with this sort of thing myself. I'd borrow some money from a friend or I'd get them from a free dispenser if I could find one. Even though I'm almost eighteen, I've never talked about anything like this with my dad.

"I just need to go and get something for myself." I tell him, hoping that he won't question me further.

But he does "Like what?"

I realise that I'm going to have to tell him, so I take a breath before saying "I- I have my period... I need to go and get myself something from the store."

His eyes widen slightly as I admit that to him and I feel his mood switch immediately.

"What do you need to get?" He questions me, and I'm starting to think that he just wants to hear me say it to him.

So I give in, telling him what I need to buy "I need to get some tampons or something. I just need a few dollars, I'll pay you back."

But instead of giving me what I want and leaving me to it, I watch as he walks closer to me, the both of us now only a few inches apart. He rests his hand on the side of my head before wrapping a curl of my hair between his fingers.

He looks into my eyes as he says to me "Look at my little girl all grown up..."

He continues "I still remember when you were a baby. You were so whiny and irritating, you'd keep me up all night, but now you're just so beautiful and you don't whine as much." He starts to ramble about things that don't make much sense to me.

I just wanted some money for tampons, not him to give me a lecture on how I was as a baby!

"I still remember when your mother gave birth to you. I don't blame her for leaving you were a pain in the ass, but now look at you! You're practically a woman now." He continues on with his speech.

And then he moves himself closer to me, if that's even possible, whispering "But you're still always gonna be my baby girl. Always."

But then suddenly, he finally moves away from me, turning around to find something. And he goes over to a set of drawers, pulling out his black wallet and he searches through it. And I watch as he holds something in his hand.

He walks over to me, grabbing my hand to give me something "Ten dollars, that should get you what you need, shouldn't it?"

I look at the money "Y-yeah, it should."

He glances over at the window, the night sky peeking through the blinds "You should get going now, it's dangerous out there. A girl like you could get hurt pretty easily..."

"Okay, I'll go now. I won't be long." I assure him.

"Don't be." His eyes show seriousness in them.

I walk towards the door with the ten dollars held tightly in my hand. But before I can grab the door handle to leave, I hear his voice once again from across the room.

"And Alexa, don't be embarrassed to talk to me about things." He tells me "You're my daughter, you don't have to be scared to come to dad about your problems."

I decide to tell him what he wants to hear as I just want to leave and get to the store before closing time. So even though I know that I definitely won't be coming to him about things such as my period, I try to convince him that I will in the future.

"Okay, I will." I put a smile on my face to make it seem more convincing.

"What do you say?" He raises his eyebrows.

"I promise." I promise him.

"Good girl."