The Girl With The Tattoo

35. worrying

Sophie

I giggle at the ending of the movie that's playing on the TV. Mum and I decided to watch a comedy whilst my mom is at work and it's been so nice to spend some time with her. We'd also raided the snack cupboard, eating an entire bag of popcorn.

"That was actually so funny!" I laugh, finally talking again.

"Yeah, that was really good!" Mum grabs the remote to turn off the movie.

"We should so watch that with mom." I suggest.

"Yeah, maybe if she gets the weekend off of work we could show it to her." Mum says, reminding me that mom might be working the entire weekend.

Thankfully though, mom has arranged to take some time off of work and this is her last week before that happens. I'm actually quite excited for mom to be home more. Although she's a little strict with me sometimes, I do like it when she's actually spending time with me.

Since the baby isn't coming yet, mom can actually focus all of her attention on me. Maybe she can even come to my graduation ceremony!

Feeling excited, I decide to ask mum about it "Is mom going to be there at my graduation?"

Mum looks like she's thinking about my question "Uhm... yeah, I think so. When is it again?"

"A couple more weeks. I don't know the exact date yet. My teacher said that the principal will be sending a letter out soon." I inform her.

"Good. I'll have to mark the date on the calendar so that we don't forget." Mum tells me.

And because I'm actually quite worried about it, I decide to ask mum this "You don't think mom would miss my graduation, do you?"

"No, of course not. Why are you asking that?" She asks me, not realising that I worry about this sort of thing.

I shrug "It's just that she's missed a lot of my things recently. She even missed my last presentation because she was working! I'd worked so hard on that because I wanted her to see how well I was doing yet she didn't even show up!"

"Soph, you know that she wanted to be there." Mum tries to convince me yet I know that it's probably not the truth "She just had a lot of work to do that week."

"What, because it was regionals weekend?" I ask mum, talking about a competition that mom takes her dancers to almost every year.

"It was regionals weekend." Mum confirms.

I lower my head "Still, it doesn't make it right that she didn't show up for me."

"I know." Mum agrees, looking slightly ashamed of mom's behaviour.

"But you don't have to worry, I'll be there for your graduation no matter what." She promises me "I wouldn't miss it for the world!"

And then she decides to change the topic of the conversation back on to my dance trip "Anyway, why don't you tell me more about what happened last week? I've been dying to know all the details!"

Mum shares the same passion for dance as I do. Actually, she was the reason that I started dancing in the first place! Apparently, she'd shown me her old dance videos and I'd told her that I wanted to try it out. The first thing I remember is being in a baby ballet class dressed in a pink leotard and tutu.

Mom also loves dance but she's always been better behind the scenes. I could've danced at her studio but both of my parents wanted me to get the best training.

"Well, we had to learn a few of the company's routines in class. I actually found them quite easy but I did learn a few things." I begin telling her about what had happened "And on the last day, we got to perform them before the winner was chosen. And then after that, we got to watch a-."

But before I can continue, mum interrupts me, jolting upright.

I watch as she winces in pain so I decide to check up on her "Are you okay? I wasn't talking too much, was I?"

Mum brushes it off, giggling a little "No, you weren't. Sorry, I think the baby just kicked my ribs."

"Oh." I giggle, feeling relieved that it wasn't anything serious.

"You can continue, I'm fine." Mum allows me to continue what I was saying, now sitting back up against the couch.

"So, then we got to watch a performance by the ballerinas that dance there and it was amazing!" I tell mum, expressing just how much I enjoyed watching their performance "I really hope I get to dance there one day, mum! It would be so special!"

Her eyes widen as she sees just how excited I am about my future "Wow, it seems like you had a good time then."

"Yeah, it was so good!" I smile "Maybe we could visit the theatre again if mom goes out of town for work!"

Mum nods "Yeah, well I'm sure we could sort something out. How about for your birthday next year?"

"Oh my god, yes! That sounds perfect! And I can ask Lexi to show me around since she's going to be dancing there this summer!" I suggest, reminding myself that Lexi won the scholarship and that I didn't.

I'm still so proud of Lexi, of course I am, but it does hurt that I didn't get the opportunity to dance there this summer. I mean, I've worked so hard and becoming a professional ballerina is my dream! But Lexi also deserves a chance even if she isn't as dedicated as I am.

I've never been a jealous person and mum has always told me to be happy for others and to celebrate their achievements.

"Oh, and I should tell you about-." I try to continue yet mom interrupts me once again.

She groans slightly, seeming to be in more pain.

"Are you sure you're okay?" I ask her, wanting to make sure.

Mum takes time to reply, but then she finally looks at me, saying "Y- yeah, I'm fine. I think I've just overworked myself today. Your mom and I were building your sister's crib, I think my body just needs to rest."

"Yeah, maybe you should go and take a nap." I suggest, not wanting her to put any more stress on her body.

The doctor told her to take it easy. The baby is so close to being here and it's so important for her to get as much rest as she can so that the baby is healthy. After her miscarriage, she's always been worried about complications in this pregnancy.

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna go and take a quick bath." She tells me, listening to my advice to rest "You'll be okay here on your own?"

I nod "Yeah, I'll be fine. I'm just gonna go and finish some homework in my room and then I'll probably go to sleep early. I have a test first period tomorrow and I seriously can't fail!"

Mum rests her hand on my leg, understanding my need to pass all of my class exams "Okay, just don't stress too much."

"Are you kidding?! I'm always stressed!" I tell her, giggling to myself a little.

I pull out my phone as soon as mum leaves the room, wanting to text Lexi because I haven't really had the chance to talk to her since we've been back. I actually haven't heard from her and I'm starting to get a little worried... I'm sure she'll be okay though.

But I decide to leave her a quick text.

Sophie: Hi, it's me. How are you? You were supposed to text me as soon as you'd gotten home. I just want to know if you're okay.

I wait for her reply yet it doesn't come. I don't know why she's ignoring me right now. I hope I've not done something wrong. But maybe her phone has died or her wifi is broken?