Maybe If We

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I was just thinking about you. How we first met. The fact that we know each other for so long now. I'm still grateful for whoever made you meet me. Smile at me. Kiss me.
I'm drawing something. Nothing good or something with meaning. No, my mind is paying attention to the picture of you in my head, a special masterpiece I wouldn't dare to forget. I'm smiling, because I remember you smiling at me. That day when I brought home a cat, and you laughed at my childishness. You're probably sitting on the couch, with him on your lap now, aren't you? I know how he always calms you when I'm not around.
I'm sad when I'm not around, yet I can't bring myself to stay longer. I have to go outside somehow, I have to share my ideas. And I'm grateful for your understanding. You always smile, and wave at me when I'm driving away from home. I know you're sad sometimes. I know you cried when I was gone for months. I know you did.
I'm happy and relieved that the scars on your wrists are healing, and slowly disappearing. I'm happy that you're getting stronger and stronger every day. You seem so brave. No. You are brave. A superhero I can't draw, because I can't draw something so beautiful. I would only get frustrated. Trust me, I tried.
I'm taking random pictures with the old camera you bought me for Christmas last year. It's special. If always want to share the memories I'm making with you. As I loom through the lens, I can see a girl that looks strangely similar to you. Ah, no. But wait..
As I look at you, you smile. That smile, it's still making me feel like a crushing teenager in high school. I'm the weird student, and you're the popular girl. You walk towards me, and I can't help but grin. It probably looks stupid, but I don't care. "Y/N!" I shout, and I don't care of anyone hears me. You laugh, and walk around the table to hug me. Ah, that scent. I always feel relaxed, comforted, safe. No wonder I had to put a ring on that delicate finger of yours. I am still wondering why you agree on being mine. Oh, I swear, God knows-

I love you.

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