(JIKOOK) Texting Story Snippets

Wrong

TRIGGER WARNING

The subject of this chapter could be triggering, please don't read if you're sensitive to really bad things..

-///-

Jimin hugs his arms around himself when Jungkook doesn't do it for him. There's tension heavy in the air between them. He shouldn't have expected a warm greeting from his boyfriend, not after the way they fought with each other before.

Jungkook feels nervous upon Jimin reaching him and they start to walk beside each other in a disheartening silence. The smaller boy stays quiet for a while, apologizing when their shoulders touch in a way that makes Jungkook feel bad. He wants to wrap his arm around Jimin, but he can't bring himself to argue against his feelings to do it. Jimin is keeping something from him. He almost wishes it wasn't true, but his suspicions have already been confirmed. It was becoming clear in a feeling of something off between them, something unspoken. The way Jimin would get so angry at problems not his own. He's been so bored by himself, so needy. He doesn't mind the needy aspect of Jimin's change and had credited it to the fact that they missed each other a lot when Jimin was gone. But, something is different. "Are you cold?" Jungkook mutters.

Jimin doesn't look at the other man, keeping his eyes on the frosty sidewalk ahead of them. He is cold, but it doesn't matter right now. "Just a little."

"I can give you my jacket." Jungkook makes a move to pull his arm from one sleeve of his heavy hoodie, but Jimin waves his hands to dismiss him.

"Don't. I have my own."

Jungkook sighs. "Alright." He should persist on the matter, his heart yearns for him to, but he drops the subject of it. He moves on to the next one. "Should we talk now, then?"

Jimin swallows audibly. "Can we walk together for a little bit longer? I want to appreciate how beautiful tonight is. We don't go out very often."

"We can walk and talk, and appreciate the night all at once."

"Just a little bit longer, please?" Jimin winces when Jungkook huffs beside him.

"How long have you been planning on keeping a secret from me?"

The question settles itself heavy on Jimin's shoulders. It makes his heart drop into his stomach and his throat closes as he holds onto his breath. He should be honest, he knows he should be. Honesty feels a lot harder than holding onto the secret in his head that he's been keeping to himself, afraid to expose it to anybody. Afraid to expose it to Jungkook. It's been the most difficult thing he's ever been burdened with, this secret, but he planned on taking it to his grave. He planned on never telling it to a single soul, but that's not how his life works. It's been driving him into insanity ridden despair. He's made it obvious by his actions lately that something is wrong. As much as he's tried burying it beneath layers of involvement in his friends relationship choices, that's exactly what's caused it to show it's ugly presence after all, using his beaten emotions as a platform to scream out that he isn't functioning correctly. "I wanted to keep it forever." Jimin whispers.

"Forever?" Jungkook stops on the sidewalk. Jimin stops his steps as well, but doesn't turn back to look at him. He can't control the tone of his voice, a combination of surprise, anger and concern entwined in his words. "You wanted to hide something from me for forever?"

The smaller nods, back facing the other man as he closes his eyes. It's not like he didn't know that he couldn't keep this a secret from Jungkook forever. But, he wanted to. He wanted it to disappear, vanish from the story of his life, as if it never happened. He wants to forget about it, like before. Now, his head works against him, every single day, constantly reminding him of how worthless he really is and how much he doesn't deserve Jungkook's attention. He doesn't deserve Jungkook. Jimin leans his head back, smiling bitterly at the star filled sky. Tears are already forming in his eyes, making the scene blurry. "Yes. Just this one thing, forever." He says with a heavy tongue. This is all he's been holding inside of him since the day he woke with the hellish memories in his head. He'd thought he was still trapped in a nightmare, a twisted image of what could have happened when he was gone. He'd thought it was a cruel image of the fate he could have had as a hostage for a mad man. But, they weren't part of any Dream, any nightmare. The memories flooded him quickly after the initial denial of what they were. It happened. It all happened, and he wasn't spared any details from the mental recount.