Chapter: 117

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Wedging my hands between us, I place them on his chest and attempt to create distance between us. But grabbing my wrists, he pushes my hands away from his chest and locks them behind my back.

Holding my hands in his one, he wraps his fingers around the back of my neck pulling me impossibly closer to him. The grip on my hands tightens when I try to move away from him, while he presses himself against me forcing me to walk backward.

All this while, his lips never leave mine.

He releases my hands and settles his hand on my back while his other hand covers the back my head when he shoves me against the wall.

Entrapping me, between himself and the wall, he slides his hands from my shoulders towards my wrists, holding my hands he guides them around his neck.

My heart clenching and unclenching with each brush of his lips against mine.

His kiss stirs the feelings which I have nearly forgotten, along with the ones which are too painful to forget.

Every kiss that we have shared flashes behind my closed eyes, making me live all those beautiful emotions all over again.

However, tears gather in my eyes while my heart twists painfully when I recall our last kiss which tainted every beautiful moment that we have shared.

Grabbing his shoulders, I push him away forcefully as a small whimper leaves my lips whereas my heart feels like it will burst any moment.

He staggers back, looking completely stunned. He seems not only surprised by my reaction, but also the way he has reacted.

He opens his mouth to say something but shuts when he notices my tears stricken face. The tears continue to stream from my eyes one after another. For so long I was keeping them at bay, but now it seems like a dam has broken.

"Avery..." He takes a careful step towards me.

"Why have you said all those words to me, Alec?" Sliding down the wall, I hold my head in my hands as his words echo in my mind. "How could you be so merciless? Not even once you thought how you are tearing me apart?" My body wrecks with the cries which were withering me from inside throughout all these years.

"You know, I never meant anything which I had said." He swallows while his voice comes out as a whisper, "Everything that came out of my mouth was a lie."

"I know it was all just an act, and whatever you said was a lie." I press my lips together to get hold of my emotions, "But the pain that I have felt was real, the tears which I have cried were real... nothing was a lie."

"Why?" My voice cracks, as anger and hurt flares inside me, "Why did you never trust me?"

"I have trusted you with my heart, my soul, my everything." Clenching my jaws, I glare at him, "Couldn't you have just trusted me for once?"

"I am sorry..." His regretful eyes lock with mine, forcing a new set of tears to spring in my eyes. "I was afraid and weak..." He breathes.

"I would have been your strength... I would have held your hand and helped you overcome all your fears." I whisper, truthfully, "I would have never let you fallen weak, Alec, but you never gave me a chance..."

"Will you be able to forgive me?" He asks quietly, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Wrong question, Alec." I shake my head while biting my lip. "The question should be, will I be able to forgive myself?"

"Because I can't." Swallowing, I wipe my tears with the heel of my palms, "I can't forgive myself for not being there for you when you were alone. For letting you bear all the pain when I could have shared your pain with you." Leaning my head back on the wall, I close my eyes.

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