The way it's meant to be

36

4 hours later

"Are you willing to kiss?" I ask frowning at the mistletoe.

"No that's disgusting"

Sighing I rub my face starting to feel self-conscious about the marks down my face "what about it is so disgusting? I know that my scars changed my looks some but I didn't think it made me unattractive, I also know I'm different than other woman but that's something I was born with".

"Because it's sick" she grunts glaring at the wall.

Nodding I look away from her trying to stay calm "right I guess I needed reminded anyone who finds me attractive is sick" I mumble.

"What did you say?" She growls.

"I said anyone finding me attractive is sick, you've made that clear plenty of times so maybe now you can explain why, is it how I was born? Because I like women? Or just me because you think I'm ugly?" I hiss.

"You're in love with an older woman but you've been seeing Alouette, Eleanor, then Evelyn you have no loyalty to that woman you claim to love"

Getting up I glare at her clinching my fists "I never said anything about an older woman, Alouette is a friend and never been anything else, mother asked  Eleanor to be my date because who I wanted wouldn't talk to me, and Evelyn and I courted because the person I want was seeing someone else, I think I could have come to love her and been happy with her but she found who she was meant for with Alouette's sister, I refuse to stand in the way of that because I know she's happy and loved".

"I SEEN YOU KISSING ALOUETTE IN THE GARDEN"

"I never kisses her I let her view my memories because I needed her to know what I do it was a Veelas way of sharing"

"WHAT MADE HER SO IMPORTANT THAT YOU TOLD HER BEFORE YOUR FRIENDS"

"Her future granddaughter was my best friend and saved me, they took me in when I got away from the guy who expected me to become a house wife like his mother" I hiss.

"Why haven't you just told the person you want?" She screams.

"Because she wouldn't accept me"

"You're just avoiding it by self sacrificing yourself because that's what you do"

"You have no clue what you are talking about Minnie so stop" I hiss.

"No you are constantly avoiding talking about her with anyone but Myrtle, I'm supposed to be your best friend but you never tell me anything" Minnie says raising her voice.

"Because every time I mentioned it you made it clear it disgusted you so I didn't to keep you happy" I snarl.

"You never really explain who or why and why you are so sure she doesn't like you back" Minnie yells.

Shaking I take a deep breath glaring at her "BECAUSE SHE SAID IT WAS DISGUSTING WHEN I MENTIONED BEING IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER FEMALE, SHE'S CONSTANTLY MADE THOSE COMMENTS BECAUSE SHE'S YOU MINERVA MCGONAGALL I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU AS MY PROFESSOR AND STILL LOVED YOU HERE, SEEING YOU THAT DAY YOU PROTECTED ME FELT LIKE HOME I FELT SAFE THAT'S WHY YOU COULD CALM ME DOWN BECAUSE I ALWAYS WANT TO MAKE YOU HAPPY" I scream shaking more.

"What?" She asks softly.

Shaking my head I cover my eyes trying to hide that I'm crying "Aquila what are you talking about?"

"I'm not repeating it so stop asking" I mumble scooting as far back as possible with the mistletoe keeping me in place, while pulling my knees to my chest laying my head on them.

5 hours later

"Aquila?" Minnie whisper.

I sigh refusing to speak "talk to me" Minnie says.

Laughing I shake my head "I've fucked everything up, I'm not even sure my niece will be born she's supposed to be born in 1953 the family tree claimed he was younger then he is now if she's not born then I failed them, even Walburga is older than the tree said".

"Walburga used magic to hide your existence then, maybe everything is still on track but your seeing it without the magic covering facts, it's not like you really tried to study them and your nieces didn't seem to know so the magic may have covered them as well so they didn't ask questions" Minnie says.

Nodding I sigh not talking again "Aquila did you mean what you said?"

Huffing I refuse to speak again "your saying that you refused to marry that man because you loved me as an old woman".

"You were in your 70's that's young for witches" I grunt.

"I thought I was older then that" she mumbles.

"War and stress ages you, at 23 I could pass for mid to late 30's and even had a few stray gray hairs, that my nieces helped me cover because I didn't know basic beauty spells that most witches learn as children" I mumble.

"I still looked old how could you find me attractive then"

"Just let it go Minnie you wouldn't understand"

"Do you still feel that way?" She asks.

"Yes, but don't worry I'll move on eventually" I mumble "can you please just agree to kissing me so we can get out and I'll leave you alone?" I ask wiping my eyes.

"No" she mumbles.

"This is such Hippogriff shit Minnie, I know you don't like me I just want out of here, I'll leave you alone unless we have no choice like classes or dinner and even then I won't talk to you"

"Why are you so self sacrificing?" She hisses pushing me "I started liking you in first year but tried to deny it, when it looked like you kissed Alouette I didn't want to understand why it upset me so much, at the holiday party I thought you looked beautiful and it upset me that you took Eleanor, I kissed your cheek to see how you would react but you rejected me doing it".

Feeling her gently tugging my hair I look up seeing her holding her hand out to me "I don't want you to leave me alone Aquila, when I thought you had died I couldn't handle it, that's when I accepted that I wanted more than I had with you but I thought it was to late, I never got to tell you but I kept losing my confidence when I went to tell you".

Standing up I sigh looking away from her "I've never thought you were disgusting I was mad you liked someone that wasn't me, I was attacking you instead of being honest with myself or you, I won't kiss you because you plan on leaving" Minnie whisper.

Shaking my head I look down frowning "stay with me Aquila, I don't want you to leave" feeling her lips press to my forehead I take a shaking breath "any of you" she adds before kissing me.